Blind Hues
by fancyatic
Summary: AU. Ashley's an aspiring musician, Spencer's blind. When Paula hires Ashley to take care of Spencer, will romance follow? Read and find out.
1. Chapter 1

**Okay so this is a new story I decided to start because the idea for it popped up on me one night, I'm not sure whether it's good enough to continue with so let me know whether I should continue with it or whether it shall forever be just one chapter:)**

**Disclaimer: South of nowhere and its characters do not belong to me:(**

Ashley pulled up to the mansion and parked her trusty Ford pickup on the large gravel driveway. When Kyla had recommended this job to her she had been skeptical to say the least. What did she know about taking care of a blind person? She didn't even know how to take care of herself. And the only reason they'd picked her was because she was apparently the same age as this girl, 21. But the truth of the matter was she really needed this job, the only way she could actually get her demos out was if she had the equipment to produce them...and that required money.

"Hello...and you must be...Ashley?"

Ashley turned to see an older blonde, quite attractive in her business suit, standing by the doorway of the ridiculously large mansion. Steeling her courage towards talking to the intimidating woman, she walked over.

"Hi, I'm Ashley Davies." Extending her hand out for a handshake she took the time to notice the firm features of this woman.

"Hello, Paula Carlin. I trust you've been informed of all the details of this job."

"Um...somewhat." The truth is she hadn't even been told much of anything about the job. Just that she'd have to help a rich blind girl get around.

"Well I'm actually on my way out, Spencer's upstairs, just let yourself in."

"Oh...okay".

Ashley made her way into the house and was immediately struck by how huge the place was. Yeah it looked big from the outside, but actually being inside made it all overwhelming. But Ashley had to admit that it was tastefully decorated, even if it didn't feel very homely, it had a sort of regal elegance that she definetly wasn't used to.

She made her way upstairs feeling a little nervous to be meeting this girl that she'd be taking care of, not really knowing what to expect. The upstairs seemed to be just as spacious as the downstairs, Ashley didn't even know where to start. Until she heard what sounded like music coming from a room down the hall.

Ashley made her way to the room, the classical music drifting to her ears as she tentatively knocked on the door.

"Come in."

Ashley slowly opened the door, peeking her head around the gap in the door. She took a quick glance around the room and noticed that it was like a whole other world compared to what she'd just walked through. The light blue walls made the room look comforting and inviting, books upon books lined the wall opposite the bed and the air was rich with the aroma of vanilla. Ashley's eyes finally reached the girl sitting behind the desk facing her patiently, and her heart stopped. The girl was undeniably beautiful, dressed in a simple black turtleneck and a pair of jeans, she made it look like it was the most sophisticated thing in the world. Compared to Spencer, Ashley thought she looked pretty plain in her hoodie, and skinny jeans. But most of all it was her eyes that caught Ashley's attention, an astounding clear blue it was almost like they twinkled.

"Hi, I'm Spencer," she said reaching out her hand.

"Hi, Ashley. Nice to meet you." Ashley took her hand in a handshake and stepped back. Not really knowing what to do next, she was wondering if Spencer would even know where to look for her of she didn't stand closer.

"It's okay, I can feel your movement. And even when you're not moving, I know where you are from the vibrations in your voice or your breathing, it kind of sends off a signal, my ears are very attune to it."

"Oh okay...I'm sorry, I'm not really sure how I'm supposed to help you." Ashley replied feeling a bit stupid for having to ask that but not really having a choice since she wasn't given much details from her sister or Spencer's mom.

"You can have a seat on my bed if you'd like?" Ashley took a seat on her bed, immediately feeling at ease by the softness of her voice.

"My mom and I just moved here from Ohio a week ago, and usually I wouldn't need any help, I'm quite self-sufficient...it's just that this is a new environment for me. Not just being in New York itself, but a new home, new surroundings, everything's different, and I just need some help getting around until I can familiarize myself with everything and then I'll basically know my way around from memory."

"You can find your way around just from memory?"

"Yeah, pretty much. It takes a while but once I get used to it it's like everything has its place and it just all sort of fits together, you know."

Ashley couldn't even imagine memorizing whole landscapes, she couldn't even remember her sister's birthday most times. And for a moment she couldn't help but feel sorry for Spencer, for having to work so hard at just getting through life.

"So what do you do? I mean, what do you do in your spare time?"

"Well, I like to write. That's a lie, I don't just like writing, I love it. I love the way that the mind can create a different world just through words. The way that one word can have so many different meanings, and the way the imagination can work wonders on a simple story."

Ashley couldn't help but get excited with Spencer, the way her face lit up when she described writing told Ashley that it was something very important to her, something that took her to another world...the way music did for her.

"I understand what you mean. I like to make music because it's something that comes from deep within, you know, like you're pouring all of your soul out into that melody and those words."

Spencer smiled at her and nodded, and Ashley couldn't help but smile back. Her smile was infectious. The atmosphere in the room was calm, like they were two friends who had just finished having a meaningful conversation.

"So...this may sound really stupid, but I have no idea where to put my stuff."

Spencer laughed. "No, it doesn't sound stupid. I'm sorry I should have told you earlier."

"Then why are you laughing." Ashley asked smiling.

"Because I can feel you tapping your feet on the floor. You're nervous."

"I am not!" Ashley replied indignant.

"Yes, you are" She smiled. "Annabelle set up the guest house for you, just turn right when you step out of the front door, you can't miss it. Well...unless you're blind that is."

Ashley didn't know whether to laugh at the joke or not, instead she opted to get off the bed and walk towards the door.

"After I'm done unpacking, maybe we can talk some more?" Ashley asked and Spencer nodded. "Oh and I was so not nervous." Ashley added as she walked out the door, not sure whether she was trying to convince Spencer of it or herself.


	2. Chapter 2

**Thank you all for the lovely replies! It looks like I'm gonna continue with this story since you guys seem to like it, but if it ever starts to go downhill let me know so I can hit myself over the head repeatedly with a pan. Thanks to everyone who left a review, it's definitely appreciated! Here's the next chapter:)**

**xsamxstutterzx: Thanks! I'm glad you like it:)**

**Capactive4: Yeah I think I like Spencer being more confident than shy in this fic. And I read your poem and thought it was really good, you should write some more.**

**itswhatever: Thanks, I hope you continue to enjoy it!**

**natamox: lol, the spelling's close enough! I hope you remain... however you spell that word:)**

**HaleyxxBrookeAAF: Hahaha, as much as I think it would be super entertaining to have you stalk me and glue/tape me to a chair, I've decided that just posting the next chapter is probably much easier for you. Enjoy!:)**

**DaNoodleUpNorthWatsUp: Thank you. Yeah the storyline is a little different and I'm hoping that I can make it work:)**

**Chapter 2**

The guest house was exactly that...a house. It was massive, and Ashley couldn't help but feel out of place living in a space that could fit three of her apartment. Even though her apartment in Brooklyn was small, it had been her home for the past two years and she loved it. Having lived in L.A. her whole life, New York was like a breath of fresh air. It was Ashley's kind of city, the hustle and bustle of people rushing to and from work, artists, musicians, dancers, pizza parlors, it was anything and everything. And standing there surrounded by things she couldn't even think of affording, she couldn't help but miss it a bit.

Quickly finishing unpacking her belongings, Ashley headed back towards the house running through what Spencer had told her in her head. If she loved reading and writing so much why hadn't she gone to college? It was obvious that they could afford it. Ashley walked into the kitchen and was momentarily startled by a woman standing over the stovetop stirring something that smelled delicious from where Ashley was standing.

"Hi. I'm Anabelle. And you are Ashley...right?" The woman asked, turning to Ashley with a curious look on her face.

So that was Anabelle, Ashley thought. She was struck by how young she looked, from what Ashley could see, she had to be in her late twenties, and very pretty. Ashley had to wonder what brought her to the Carlin house.

"Yeah, I'm Ashley. Do you need any help with the cooking or anything?" Ashley asked, moving into the kitchen more.

"Um, actually if you could chop up those onions on the counter over there that would be great"

"Yeah, no problem."

Ashley got to work, and soon realized it was going to be harder than she thought since the onions seemed to be making her eyes water like crazy, and probably looked quite ridiculous bouncing on her toes with tears streaming down her face.

"I take it you don't do much cooking yourself?" Anabelle smirked.

"Uh...no not really. I usually just get takeout or my sister cooks," Ashley replied, looking sheepish.

Anabelle moved over to where Ashley stood, knife in hand, ready to attack some more of those devil onions. Taking the knife out of her hand, she stood close to Ashley, knife hand poised over the onions.

"My mom taught me a trick when I was younger, if you place the knife at an angle over the onion like this, and then start chopping really fast, the onion doesn't get a chance to let out its vapors."

Ashley watched in amazement as Anabelle started chopping the onions like a pro, rolling through the two onions in less time than it took Ashley to cut up one.

"Wow, that was really good, and really fast. You're not gonna tell me that that's how everyone cuts onions are you?"

"Maybe." Anabelle smiled. "But I wouldn't want to hurt your feelings. Believe it or not but I was actually on Top Chef a couple of years ago."

"No way! Are you serious? I've never actually watched it but my sister Kyla's obsessed with it!" Ashley replied, imagining how excited Kyla would be if she were standing in Ashley's shoes.

"It was no big deal. I made it past the first few rounds and then I accidentally burnt the eyebrows off one of the judges."

Ashley just watched with a shocked face as she started stirring whatever was in the pot again, until Anabelle turned around with a grin on her face.

"Just kidding. It was an overcooked steak...that knocked me out of the competition, not that knocked his eyebrows off I mean."

They both laughed, and Ashley noted that for the second time tonight she actually felt comfortable in the house, the first time being in Spencer's bedroom. Thoughts of feeling comfortable led her back to wondering what Spencer was doing at that moment.

"I think I'm gonna go talk to Spencer for a bit, you'll be here for the rest of the night, right?" Ashley asked hoping she could get a chance to talk with her a bit more.

"Yeah, go ahead. Could you let Spencer know that dinner should be ready in a half an hour?"

Ashley nodded and headed up the stairs, feeling nervous again and not knowing exactly why. Spencer's door was wide open and Ashley entered slowly, hoping that she wasn't intruding on anything. Surprisingly, Spencer was just lying on her back on her bed, completely flat on her back and apparently entranced by her ceiling. Ashley walked over slowly and stood by the bed.

"Hey" Ashley tentatively sat down beside her on the bed.

"Hey"

"What are you thinking about?" All Ashley wanted to do at that moment was wrap her up in her arms, she just looked so vulnerable.

"Things...Can I ask you something?"

"Yeah, anything."

"What does the ocean look like? I know it's just water, but what does it look like, you know. I remember in 2nd grade I'd listen to the other kids describe what things looked like, how the ocean was blue, but what's blue look like? Sometimes I get so frustrated about the things I can't see, the things I'm blind to, I don't even know what my own mother looks like."

Ashley took Spencer's hand in her own, gently stroking the back of her hand with her thumb.

"But you can feel, Spencer, you can feel. And that's better than seeing. Feeling is seeing in a higher dimension, being able to see through your heart and your soul. And nothing's better than that."

Ashley slowly got up, hoping that Spencer would take what she said to heart. She didn't tell Spencer that sometimes she wished she could be blind to the world, to not have to see the people that hurt her. Ashley grabbed onto Spencer's hand, pulling her off the bed.

"Come on, let's go get some dinner before Anabelle burns her eyebrows off!"

"What?" Spencer replied looking confused.

"Don't worry, I'll tell you on the way down...all I know is she's deadly with a knife. Remind me never to piss her off please."

Spencer laughed and let Ashley lead her downstairs, wondering why she felt so comfortable around this girl that she'd known for less than a day, but loving the way Ashley's thumb was stroking her hand.


	3. Chapter 3

**Once again I love all the replies I've gotten, and I love everybody who reads this! I seriously get soooo excited when I see reviews so keep em coming, it's keeping my morale up lol! I kind of want this fic to be as interactive with all of you readers as possible, sort of like choose your own story, so if there's anything you'd like to see happen let me know and I'll see what I can do:)**

**Chapter 3**

Dinner was delicious, and Ashley expected nothing less from an apparent top chef. And sitting at the dining room table with both Anabelle and Spencer, she couldn't help but feel a sense of nostalgia, remembering the nights she would have dinner with her best friends Aiden and Madison...but that was a long time ago. Almost like a different world, when she was naive and trusting and thought friends would always be friends no matter what happened.

"Do you mind going outside with me, Ashley?"

Ashley turned to see Spencer standing by the front door with Anabelle standing to the side a little bit, looking at Ashley. The look on Anabelle's face was indecipherable and Ashley wasn't sure why she was looking at her that way.

"Yeah, sure Spencer"

Ashley made her way over to Spencer and gently took her hand in her own, realizing that it was becoming a habit for her to instantly reach for her hand whenever she was near. They made their way outside, enjoying the breeze that flowed over them and listening to the sound of the wind as it rustled through the fall leaves.

"I wanna show you something. I think it's my favorite part of this whole house, I don't get to go to it that often, you know, because I can't really be walking around outside by myself yet, but when I get the chance I get Anabelle to walk me over and I always just feel so peaceful there, you know. I think it's the only part of the house I have memorized, so I'll always find my way."

Ashley found the roles being reversed, with Spencer leading her through the front yard and down a lit wooded path that led them out of the mansion gate. The path kept on going, and Ashley was starting to wonder whether this was a good idea, when they reached what looked to be a secret garden. The first thing Ashley noticed was the huge oak tree whose branches seemed to be hanging over a pond in the center of the clearing. The moon reflecting on the pond made the garden seem almost magical, and the smell of the fresh flowers and lavender that was blooming everywhere made it even more appealing.

"Wow, Spencer. I don't even know what to say. It's absolutely beautiful."

Ashley continued to look in awe around her surroundings, marveling that things like this actually existed and weren't just in fairy tales.

"Is it?" Spencer asked, looking whimsical.

"Yeah. It's the most amazing place I've ever seen. I feel like I just stepped into Narnia or something!"

Spencer chuckled, and Ashley turned to look at Spencer curiously. Amazed at the way the moonlight was hitting her face, illuminating her so much that it almost looked like she was an angel. She shrugged the thought off, not liking the sinking feeling it was giving her in her stomach and was momentarily stunned by the twinkling in Spencer's blue eyes, finding herself not being able to look away.

"Come sit with me"

Ashley obediently followed Spencer to the old oak tree, holding her hand tightly and not wanting to let go. They sat down next to each other close with their backs against the strong tree. Nothing was said and for some reason it didn't bother Ashley in the slightest, it was actually quite peaceful for Ashley, looking out over the pond and feeling Spencer so close to her. The silence went on peacefully for a while longer until Ashley felt Spencer move even closer to her.

"Do you believe in God, Ashley?"

Ashley had to admit, the question threw her off guard and brought to her mind the fact that she hadn't really thought about it.

"I...I don't know. I mean, I'm not sure. I'd like to think that there's something up there taking care of us but I just don't know. It's hard to believe sometimes, you know."

The comfortable silence took its place again as they looked out towards the pond, Ashley patiently waiting for Spencer to speak what was on her mind.

"Sometimes I get these dreams, but they feel so real, like, it's actually happening. It's like I'm being lifted into the sky and there's light all around me, it's so bright. But I don't know, it's like I can see, for the first time I can actually see. Don't ask me what I see because I honestly don't know, all I know is that I am seeing, and that I'm seeing some of the most beautiful things in the world."

Ashley had her eyes transfixed on hers, once again feeling that sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach. It all sounded so foreboding to her and she had no idea why, like Spencer would be leaving and her chest hurt at the thought, it didn't take a genius to know why. It was obvious she had feelings for Spencer, it was clear from the moment they met, but the way she was feeling right now was something new, something she'd never experienced before.

"I'm sorry, I bet that sounded really weird to you. I've only just met you and I'm already telling you my crazy dreams." Spencer blushed red.

"No...no it's not weird. What is weird is that I sometimes listen to Kelly Clarkson when no one's around. I know, I know...I'm so ashamed."

"Hey! I like Kelly Clarkson." Spencer laughed, giving Ashley a little shove.

"I'm not even surprised" Ashley smirked.

"Oh yeah, and why's that?" Spencer replied cocking an eyebrow, and smiling in an adorable way.

"Because you my friend are so Justin Timberlake...and I, fortunately for you am so Led Zeppelin. But don't worry I think I can teach you a thing or two about the finer side of music."

"Oh no way! No one insults JT, he's been on my favorites list for the last four years." Spencer replied, taking the opportunity to tickle Ashley mercilessly, both of them rolling around in the grass laughing hysterically. Ashley, unknown to Spencer, was a master of tickling having successfully tickled Kyla into submission on many occasions, and soon the roles were reversed, with Ashley pinning Spencer down on the ground.

"Okay, okay, mercy! I give up!" Spencer cried out.

"Tell me I'm the Queen of the world." Ashley chuckled.

"You're the Queen of the world." Spencer muttered, so quietly it was almost a whisper.

Ashley suddenly realized the position they were in, bodies pressed tightly against each other, Ashley's arms on either side of Spencer holding her up. Ashley made a move to get up but Spencer pulled her back down. Her hand moved up to Ashley's face, gently using her fingers to trace her forehead, her eyebrows, nose, cheeks, and then mouth. Ashley couldn't help the way her eyes fluttered shut, enjoying the way Spencer's soft fingers traced her face. Ashley almost moaned at the loss of contact when Spencer's hand left her face and fell back to the ground beneath her.

"You're beautiful." Spencer whispered.

Neither of them noticed Anabelle standing by the entrance to the garden.

**HaleyxxBrookeAAF: Aaah, you are my favorite reviewer, I laugh every time! And I am definitely a chocolate cookie person, how did you know? You're psychic right? As long as you keep bribing me with baked goodies I'll be sure to churn out some more chapters lol.**

**Videl1212: Thank you! I'm glad I uploaded this chapter too:)**

**carrebear14: Here you go!**

**xxMaNdyxx: Thank you:)**

**thousandlies: Hope you enjoyed this update.**

**Sea17: lol, thank you!**

**TROPPER12: I'm glad you liked it:)**

**dttdemon: Thank you:)**

**Tatj: That is kind of sad, and I'm glad I'm getting the feelings and emotions down pat I hope I can continue to make it as real as possible, it's kind of hard with Spencer since I'm not blind myself, I'm trying to make the emotions as close to the real thing as possible:)**

**Vanessa Riverton: Thanks, I hope you liked this chapter.**

**weightofitall: Oh yeah, there's definitely some sparks lol.**

**itswhatever: Thank you!**

**Uber-monster: Hope you enjoyed this:)**

**lexj: I'm interested to see how this develops too lol, it really could go anywhere at the moment:)**

**LoveAsh87: Thanks. Spencer +Ashley Sooo Cute!**

**Suspenceme: I like that! I think that's the best description anybody could come up with for those colors, I can see how it'd be definitely hard though, I am so bad at describing things:)**

**chloedarko: Thank you. I hope you're enjoying it so far!**

**XSamXStutterzX: It is really sad that Spencer's blind, but I think it shows that their love isn't physical...it's emotional more than anything, and I love that:)**

**Hotcutti3: Thank you. Enjoy the update:)**


	4. Chapter 4

**Don't worry, lol, all will be revealed about Anabelle soon:) And unfortunately I won't be able to update as often as I do now that school's starting, but I promise I won't pull a walkingcorpse on you guys;) Apparently, as has been pointed out to me by some fellow readers, if you know what I'm talking about then you are a true SON fanfiction devotee! So give yourselves a clap on the back:) Here's the next chapter.**

**Chapter 4**

The sound of Anabelle coughing startled both Ashley and Spencer out of the moment they were sharing. Ashley awkwardly getting off Spencer and helping her to her feet, turned towards Anabelle, honestly feeling a little embarrassed to have been caught in what looked like such a compromising position.

"Paula's home, and um, I think she wants to speak to both of you." Anabelle stated, looking from Spencer's blushed face to Ashley's fidgety hands.

"Oh okay, Spencer you ready?" Spencer nodded at Ashley that she was all set.

"Do you need any help, Spencer?" Anabelle asked her, moving towards her in an effort to hold her hand.

"No, thanks...Ashley's got it"

Ashley couldn't help but smile a little bit as she slipped her hand into Spencer's, but her smile faltered a little bit when she saw the frown on Anabelle's face. She couldn't help but feel that Anabelle disapproved of her in some way, she wasn't exactly sure why. Making a mental note to talk to her a bit more tonight, they started to walk out of what Ashley had decided to call the "safe haven", and down the long path that led to the house.

"So...what have you two been up to?"

Ashley wished she could see the expression on Anabelle's face, but couldn't because she was walking slightly behind her.

"Nothing much. Just talking." Spencer replied easily.

The walk back to the house was completed in relative silence and was met by a rather bored looking Paula Carlin talking on her cell phone in the sitting room. As soon as she saw them approaching she abruptly hung up on the phone.

"Ashley. I hope you haven't had any problems yet." She asked curtly.

"No, none yet, Mrs. Carlin" Ashley responded with a smile.

"Great. I just wanted to let both of you know that I won't be here for the next week, I'm going on a business trip."

"Another business trip? You just got back from one two days ago." Spencer, Ashley noticed, looked forlorn but unsurprised at the same time. "When are you leaving?"

"Right now."

"But mom, you were supposed to take me to the opera tomorrow, can't you leave after tomorrow?"

"I'm sorry Spencer, but we're just going to have to do it some other time, I've got to go. I'll see you next week."

Ashley watched as Paula grabbed her purse and hurriedly exited through the front door. Turning to look at Spencer, she couldn't help but feel sorry for her. The look of dejection on her face was one she was very familiar with, having seen it many times before on her own face.

"Hey" Ashley whispered. "Are you okay?"

Her sigh was answer enough that she wasn't fine.

"Yeah, I think I'm just gonna head up to my room now."

"Do you want me to come with you?" Ashley was hoping that she'd say yes, the hurt look on Spencer's face was causing her own chest to tighten and she was willing to do whatever it took to make her feel better.

"No...I'm just gonna head to bed early, but I'll see you in the morning right?" Ashley gave her a head nod. "Goodnight, Ashley"

"Goodnight"

Ashley watched her form ascend up the stairs, using the guardrail to guide her. Briefly wondering if she needed some help to get to her room, but something was telling Ashley that she'd really rather be alone at the moment, and Ashley could respect that. The noise from the kitchen reminded Ashley that Anabelle was still around, and she figured now would be as good a time as any to get to know her more. Making her way into the kitchen, Ashley observed Anabelle sharpening her knives from behind the kitchen island.

"I'd always thought being a chef was half martial arts and half cooking. And here is visible proof."

That earned a chuckle from Anabelle, and Ashley was inwardly relieved. Out in the garden she'd thought that maybe Anabelle might be angry with her, but if she was laughing at her lame joke she couldn't really be that upset.

"Yes, I think you're right, it's an art form. I cook, beat people up, cook, beat people up. It's a perfect balance between the two...not everyone can do it, you know." She smiled.

"I can only imagine." Ashley laughed. "So what exactly is your job description...besides being a martial arts chef extraordinaire?"

"Well, I'm basically the personal chef/Personal assistant. When I'm not cooking, I kind of keep the house in order, making sure everybody who works here gets paid regularly, taking messages for Paula, and you know, other little jobs that make me the best."

"Oh, so you're pretty much my boss then." Ashley smiled, noticing the dimples that formed on Anabelle's face when she grinned.

"Yeah, I am aren't I, so you'd better be extra nice to me."

"That won't be a problem." Ashley smiled. "So where do you stay?"

"Follow me and I'll show you."

Ashley followed behind her as she led her to a door that was adjacent to the kitchen. They walked through the door and into her living area. Ashley was surprised at how big the place was, it was like she had her own little apartment within the house.

"This is really nice." Ashley commented.

"Yeah it is. Sometimes I think that it's way too big for just me, you know."

Ashley nodded, she could definitely understand that. She followed Anabelle over to the couch where they both sat down.

"So have you always lived in New York?" Ashley asked pulling her feet up onto the couch to get into a better position.

"Actually no, I moved to New York when Spencer did, I've lived in Ohio my whole life."

"Wait...so how long have you actually known Spencer then?" Ashley asked looking a bit confused.

"Since she was a baby. Her dad was my dad's best friend. Let's just say I took care of her when the kids in middle school would tease her...and by take care of, I mean I beat them up." She chucked.

Ashley looked at her intrigued, having about a million questions but not sure if she could ask them without sounding too intrusive. So she asked the one question that she wanted to ask the most, the one question she'd wanted to ask ever since she stepped into that bedroom.

"Could you tell me about Spencer?"

Almost immediately Anabelle started to look uncomfortable, and Ashley was starting to think that maybe it was the wrong question to ask when she answered.

"I don't really know how to explain this...but Spencer's special...in a way that we can't quite understand."

* * *

**Videl1212: Note taken! Now that I think about it I'd probably get out of hand too if I got to choose what happened in other stories lol!**

**DERxROS: Thank you! I'm glad you like it:)**

**Vanessa Riverton: I'm so excited to hear that they make your day! It makes my day when I see all your reviews:)**

**Supergirl6: Haha, yeah she can definitely wield a knife so I'd be careful not to get on the wrong side of her!**

**xDloverx: Thanks! It's kind of easy to get the chemistry going when it's Spencer and Ashley:)**

**Uber-Monster: Wouldn't we all kill to be in that situation!:)**

**crickett13: Yep, you definitely will, probably in the next couple of chapters things will be revealed:)**

**Capactive4: I like your theory:)**

**lexj: Oh you'll find out!**

**gamin: I'm glad you gave it a shot too:)**

**weightofitall: Thanks! I'm excited to be back, and I think you may be right about it getting out of hand, I'd like to hear where everybody thinks the story will go, doesn't mean I'm gonna go with it though lol, but it's nice to hear different perspectives:)**

**charmedcrazy14: Thank you! I hope you continue to read and enjoy!**

**dttdemon: I know, it's easy to forget that she's blind, but in a way I think that's a good thing:)**

**TCHS-SoP-chick: Aww, unfortunately it's not! She's a very beautiful Latino woman...with cute dimples and culinary skills!:)**

**IloveSBC: I feel bad that I made you mad...but I hope this update makes you happy!:)**

**MasterDannison2: Thank you!**

**idrinktogetdrunk: It is pretty weird, I mean especially for us since we don't know what it feels like to be blind.**


	5. Chapter 5

**So, it was my birthday on sunday. Another year older, 20 to be exact. And as a special birthday treat for myself and you guys I decided to post the next chapter earlier than I thought I would. So here it is, enjoy:)**

**Chapter 5**

"What do you mean, she's special?" Ashley was confused, and it was apparent by the way she was squeezing the fabric of the couch that she was also more than a little bit scared of the reply.

Anabelle fidgeted in her seat.

"Spencer's been different since she was a kid. I'm not exactly sure when it started, but when she was small she used to see things that people couldn't possibly have seen happening."

"What, you mean even when she was blind" Ashley asked confused.

"No, this was before she was blind. You see, Spencer didn't become blind until she was five, and even how that happened is a mystery to us. But before she was blind she'd know things that were going to happen even before they happened. "

"Like a psychic, you mean."

"Not quite, she didn't have visions or anything, it was sort of like instinctive...like she just knew. I remember one time we were out in my backyard playing. We were picking daisies, I was 8 at the time and she was 4, and all of a sudden, completely nonplussed, she told me that she liked big red balloons but that she didn't like it when they popped. Ten minutes later, a red hot air balloon crashed into our next door neighbors yard...the guy in it died. I never told anyone that."

Anabelle stared out the window while Ashley was frantically trying to process this information, her mind going a mile a minute. From what she could gather, Anabelle was telling her that Spencer was some sort of clairvoyant. She was confused, her logical mind was telling her that things like this didn't exist, but she couldn't shake off the feeling she had had when they were out in the garden. And looking back on it she realized that the feeling she had had was one telling her that there was danger, but at the same time she couldn't pull herself away. It was like she was drawn to it like a moth to a flame.

"Does it still happen...I mean...can she still see things?"

"I don't know. After her dad and Clay died, and she lost her sight she never told me anything anymore."

"Wait...what? How did her dad die, and who's Clay?"

"Clay was her adopted brother, and they both died in a car crash a couple of months before her fifth birthday."

"Did Spencer predict that as well?"

"Yes." Anabelle answered with a wry smile.

They both sat in silence, each of them in their own thoughts. Ashley staring at a picture of Anabelle and Spencer at the beach, Spencer looking to be about 8 years old. Ashley couldn't help but wonder what that mind was thinking as she ignored the camera and scooped sand into a bucket, her blonde hair blowing in the wind. And her heart wrenched at what kind of childhood she had, maybe it was even worse than hers.

"Is there anything else I should know?" Ashley looked expectantly at Anabelle.

"There is one thing...but I can't be the one to tell you. Spencer has to, I can't be the one to tell you."

Anabelle shifted her gaze to her lap quickly, but not quickly enough that Ashley didn't notice the tears forming in them.

"Hey...whatever it is, it's okay. Everything's going to be okay." Ashley whispered placing her hand over hers.

Ashley left Anabelle's room worried. When she'd asked to be told more about Spencer she definitely hadn't expected that. She's not sure what she expected but it wasn't that. And her confused mind was giving her the sudden urge to just walk to Spencer's room and ask her if what Anabelle had said was true, but once she reached the outside of her door she just couldn't muster up the courage. Spencer was already hurting...she didn't want to add to that. So she went to bed, her mind boggled down with thoughts of death and Spencer. All of this was hitting to close to home for Ashley. Her dad had believed in things like this and her mind automatically took her back to her 10th birthday.

_"Ashley...look up." Her dad was holding her close in his arms, sitting on the steps of their porch. Ashley looked up, noticing the bright stars and the way they seemed to move amongst themselves like they were playing tag._

_"The stars are so bright, daddy." He laughed._

_"Oh those aren't stars, baby. Those are angels. You see, everyone has their own to take care of them...yours is up there somewhere, and do you know how to find it?"_

_Ashley squirmed in his lap, anxious to know how to find her guardian angel. "How!"_

_"Well...you've just gotta find the star that you think is the brightest...and that's your angel." He smiled._

_Ashley looked up, and it didn't take her long to find one star that out shadowed all the others with its brightness, twinkling so much it was almost as if it were winking at her._

_"It's that one, daddy!...It's that one." Ashley pointed to her star of choice._

_"That's your angel baby. Whenever you need help, all you've gotta do is ask it and it'll be there. Now what are you gonna call it?"_

_Ashley thought for a while, mentally asking her angel to tell her what its name was._

_"Mia...I'm gonna call it Mia."_

Ashley woke with a start, momentarily wondering where she was before the events of yesterday came to her mind. Thoughts of Spencer flooded her brain as she showered, and she wondered what she was doing at that moment. The act of getting dressed was interrupted by the sound of her cell phone ringing.

"Hello?"

"Ashley!! How's life in the country? Have you gotten eaten by any goats yet?"

Ashley laughed at her friend Mark's overly dramatic ways, he had a voice that always seemed to pick her up when she was feeling gloomy. And she could just imagine his messy blonde hair and dark green eyes downing a glass of vodka mixed with orange juice as he talked to her.

"Mark! It's good to hear from you, what are you up to?"

"Oh you know, just sipping my special morning drink and wondering how the hell you are? You do remember that you're playing at Mac's tonight don't you?"

Ashley grimaced, she had completely forgotten. With everything that had been going on, she wasn't even surprised. But this was a big night for her, there was no way that she could mess this up. She'd heard from a friend that a record label scout was going to be there, and this was a perfect opportunity to show them what she was made of.

"Yeah, I know." Ashley sighed.

"Are you nervous?"

"Honestly, a little bit. I'm afraid I'm gonna mess things up like the last time."

The last time she had played in front of a scout, she had been so nervous that she had forgotten the chords at the beginning of the song. It had sounded terrible, and the scout hadn't even waited five minutes for her to get back on track before he had left.

"You're not gonna mess it up, okay. The music's in your blood, just go with the flow."

"Thanks Mark. I'll see you tonight." Ashley wasn't a hundred percent convinced by Marks assurances but she was a little bit less nervous.

"Don't be late."

After getting dressed, Ashley made her way up to Spencer's room. It was her day off but she had something to ask her. She knocked lightly on her door, stepping in when she heard the now familiar voice call for her to come in. Spencer was sitting at her desk, dressed in her bathrobe and brushing her slightly wet hair through with a brush.

"Oh...I'm sorry, I didn't know you were getting dressed. I'll just come by later." Ashley said, embarrassed when her thoughts automatically went to Spencer not wearing anything under that robe.

"Don't be sorry...It's not like I'm naked or anything." Spencer replied.

Yeah, that's not why I'm apologizing. I'm apologizing for thinking about you naked under that robe, Ashley thought to herself.

"So how did you sleep?" Spencer asked turning in Ashley's direction.

"Pretty well." Ashley lied. "How about you?"

"Good."

For some reason Ashley knew that Spencer was lying too.

"Not that I don't like talking to you or anything, but it is your day off...you don't have to be up here, you know?"

Ashley was momentarily lost in Spencer's eyes, in the way they twinkled a bright blue. And from those perfect orbs, her eyes wandered down to the trickle of water that was slowly running down her neck towards...

"Are you okay?" Spencer asked, concerned at the silence after her question.

"Yeah, yeah I'm fine." And Ashley had never been more grateful that Spencer couldn't see her at that moment, having just been checking her out and blushing a bright red. "I just...well I was going to ask you if you wanted to come and see me play tonight? You don't have to of course, but I was just thinking...you know, maybe you might like it, and if you don't that's okay too." Ashley trailed off.

"I'd really like that." Spencer replied smiling.

"Okay." Ashley smiled back. "I'll let you get dressed then, how about we leave around 6?"

"Sounds good, I'll be ready."

"Oh and you know, if you don't like my music you can just tell me. I think I respond very well to constructive criticism." Silently telling Spencer that she didn't have to pretend to like her music if she didn't.

"Oh, I think I'd like anything you made." Spencer grinned at her.

Ashley blushed, leaving the room she marveled at how a few words out of Spencer's mouth could make her feel on top of the world.

* * *

**Hotcutii3: I hope this chapter answered your questions:)**

**to-you-I'm-chained-and-bound: Hi, new reader! I'm glad you're liking this story:)**

**Vanessa Riverton: Cliffies, make me bite my nails but i love it when i finally find out what happens lol!**

**XSamXStutterzX: hmmm, I like the way you think, you're just gonna have to see about Anabelle though:)**

**spashley20: Ooops, sorry about that lol! Thanks for pointing that out though, I'm gonna be better at proof reading from now on:)**

**BrEaKiNg HaZeL: Hey Skittlez! I love cookies! If you give me chocolate chip ones I'll give you updates lol! Haha, I'll try to overdose you on this story...that sounds so bad doesn't it! :)**

**CapActive4: I tend to write shorter chapters, I don't know, it's just the way I roll. But I made this one longer just for you:)**

**gamin: lol, thanks!**

**charmedcrazy14: I love your babbling! And I love that you like this story and I hope that you liked this update:)**

**HaleyXXBrookeAAF: We must be twins because I LOVE cheesecake!! You amuse yourself but you amuse me more:) And I'm curious about this Italian pastry...maybe you can magic a hundred of them through your computer screen to mine! Yeah? Okay, Can't wait!:)**

**Uber-Monster: Hahaha, a five year old on a sugar high? That's me everyday!**

**weightofitall: Your two cents do mean a lot, I think you should be my mentor. Are you up for it?:)**


	6. Chapter 6

**Thank you all for the reviews and encouragement, and sorry for the long space between updates I've just been quite busy with school and everything. And yes for weightofitall being my new mentor...it's a very serious job, you know:) But anyway, here's the next chapter:)**

**Chapter 6**

They left for the show right on time, Ashley helping Spencer into her Ford pickup and then taking a seat on the driver's side. She had been surprised to see Spencer come out of her room wearing a Led Zeppelin rock tee and some faded jeans, surprised because she'd never imagined her dressed so casually, from what she'd seen so far Spencer's taste in clothes was more classic, she was sort of like the girl next door that every guy would want to bring home to their parents.

"So you like Led Zeppelin?" Ashley asked, slowly pulling out of the Carlin's driveway.

"Yeah...I think I do, they weren't really the kind of music I listened to, but then a couple of years ago Anabelle played me some of their music and I was hooked. What about you? Are you more into hard rock or let's say...Britney Spears?" She teased.

"Before or after she shaved her head off?" Ashley smiled.

Spencer laughed. "Umm...both?"

"Hmm, I'm gonna say I don't think I'll ever be into Britney Spears. I'll admit though that I listened to her when I was like thirteen...but that doesn't count because we all know that that's the year everybody loses their mind."

"Yes, yes, I think you're right. But tell me something, when did you start to think that you wanted to be a musician?" Spencer asked, feeling the thrum of the engine under her fingertips against the window.

"Ever since I can remember. My dad used to play his guitar and sing to me every night that he wasn't at work, which wasn't often because he worked nights at this paper mill, but I just loved the nights that he was home, I can't even tell you how much. At first I just listened, but as I got older I started to sing along with him, just watching the way his fingers slid so easily up and down the guitar. I started playing the guitar myself when I was eight...haven't put it down since."

Spencer smiled, trying to imagine a young Ashley singing her heart out, wondering what her voice would have sounded like.

"Did you ever sing, or play a musical instrument or anything like that?" Ashley asked taking a quick glance over to her.

"Me? Oh no, I am not musically inclined at all, I can hardly even carry a note...all I can compare my voice to is nails on a chalkboard." She chuckled.

"Oh my God, I love the sound of nails on a chalkboard!" Ashley teased.

"Shut up." Spencer smiled, then played with her fingers as she listened to the soft sounds of Ella Fitzgerald ease through the speakers.

They arrived at Mac's bar a half an hour before Ashley was supposed to be on set. The sounds of Brooklyn's finest reached their ears as Ashley helped Spencer out of the car, and Spencer couldn't help but feel out of her comfort zone. She wasn't used to this environment and Ashley could feel it by the way she was holding on to her arm tightly as they walked into the bar.

"Ashley!! God, I expected you here at least an hour earlier so you could watch me get crazy drunk before your big show!"

Ashley looked at her friend Mark walking towards her, clearly a little bit tipsy already.

"I'm sorry Mark, but watching you get drunk isn't particularly very interesting to me."

He laughed, and then his eyes fell on Spencer who was still holding tightly onto Ashley's arm.

"And who is this gorgeous being?" He asked, his eyes checking Spencer out from head to foot and then stopping at her sparkling blue eyes.

Ashley frowned, not liking the way he was not so subtly checking her out, and feeling a little possessive of her.

"This is Spencer." Ashley replied tightly.

"Hi Spencer, I'm Mark." He held out his hand for her and was a bit put out when she made no moves to shake it. Ashley smiled a bit, realizing that he hadn't noticed that she was blind and his cocky confidence was starting to fade.

"Hi Mark, nice to meet you." Spencer replied easily, flashing him a dazzling smile.

"Hey, I got us a table right at the front, just follow me ladies."

His confidence back up at the sight of the smile Spencer flashed him, he led them to a table at the front, pulling their seats out for them.

"Can I get you ladies a drink?" He asked, slightly hovering over Spencer.

"Can I just get an orange juice please." Spencer replied.

"I'll have a vodka cranberry." Ashley glared at him as he walked to the bar to get their drinks.

Ashley wasn't sure why she was so nervous all of a sudden. She knew she wasn't nervous about performing, which was weird in itself because she always got nervous, but she was starting to think that maybe she was nervous about Spencer, nervous because she wanted to make a good impression on her.

"Is this okay? I mean, I know it's pretty noisy in here and a bit smoky too, but we can leave whenever you want to if you're uncomfortable or anything?" Ashley worriedly asked.

Spencer smiled at her. "Ashley, I'm fine. Stop worrying, the building could be burning down and I still wouldn't miss your performance."

"If the building was burning down I'd be the first one to drag your butt out of here." Ashley laughed.

Spencer reached for Ashley's hand, placing her own on top of Ashley's and gently stroking.

"Are you nervous at all?" She asked.

The moment was interrupted by Mark bringing their drinks to the table, Spencer slowly removed her hand and said thank you to Mark as he put her drink down in front of her.

"Do you mind if I borrow Mark for a second?" Ashley asked Spencer.

"Sure, I'll be fine here...just make sure if the place starts burning down that you come and drag me out."

Ashley smiled and then pulled Mark away from the table towards the back of the bar, occasionally glancing back to the front to make sure Spencer was okay. Mark looking particularly affronted turned to her expectantly waiting for her to air her grievance.

"Look, I know you're interested in Spencer, I've seen that look on your face many times...but she's out of bounds, not allowed, no entry, got it?" Ashley stated, emphatically waving her finger at him to make her point clear.

"Hey! What gives you the right to tell me what I can and can't do. And what if I'm genuinely interested in her then huh?"

"You didn't even notice she was blind idiot, I doubt you'd be able to notice any of the intimate details that make Spencer special. Now I'm telling you to back off...otherwise...our friendship is over." Ashley looked him in the eye seriously, waiting for his answer.

"She's blind?"

Ashley sighed with relief, knowing that this was his way of saying that all would be forgotten. She'd never asked him to do something like this for her, and it was obvious by the way that he was looking at her that he was surprised.

"Yes! Now go sit with her while I go backstage and set up."

Mark obediently went back to his seat and struck up a conversation with Spencer while Ashley went backstage to tune her guitar and talk to the DJ. She knew she was being selfish by asking Mark not to pursue Spencer but she couldn't help it. As crazy as it sounds, for some reason she felt that Spencer belonged to her in a way, that Spencer was hers and nobody else's. She observed herself in the mirror, white tank top, dark skinny jeans and her favorite belt, her hair a mass of shoulder length auburn curls. "I look okay" Ashley thought to herself as she grabbed her guitar and listened to the MC announce her name to the audience.

At the sound of applause she made her way out onto the stage, sitting on the stool in front of the mic, her gaze instantly went towards Spencer. The soft smile on her face calmed her as she began to talk to the audience about the first song she was going to play. Her eyes scanned the crowd as she talked, noticing the scout immediately, it wasn't hard, he was wearing a business suit and seemed to be the only one not enjoying himself. Her gaze fell on Spencer again as she started strumming her guitar softly, and as she felt the overwhelming calm envelope her from Spencer, she began to sing.

_If this is a question, is maybe a lie_

_If yes doesn't mean it, does when lessen why_

_You are held in a cue, someone will be with you shortly_

_Say I'm wrong, you decide_

_I don't believe the words you sing sometimes_

_But then it's your life_

_It's your life_

_But then it's your life_

_It's your life_

_But, you've only got one_

_You've only got one_

_But, you've only got one_

* * *

**So the lyrics for the song that Ashley sings was carefully borrowed from the band Frou Frou and the song's called Only Got One. Obviously the version Ashley sings is acoustic, and I imagined it in my head sounding a bit different from the original when Ashley sings it.**

**Vanessa Riverton: Hope you enjoyed this update! I think this whole fic is gonna have a lot of aww or drama moments so look out for them!**

**xxMandyxx: Thank you, hopefully you liked this chappie:)**

**Videl1212: Thanks! There's gonna be some more flashbacks so keep an eye out for them.**

**weightofitall: Hahaha, I agree 100 percent!**

**BrEaKiNg HaZeL: lol, I have a general idea for the rest of the story, nothings set in stone yet...so maybe I'll slip you're look-alike in there somewhere...if you bake me chocolate chip cookies that is:)**

**Spashley20: Thank you!:)**

**AbsoluteGarbage: Thanks, I love it when people say I'm not bad at writing because for some reason I always seem to think I am...usually it's at 2am when I'm actually writing the stories though lol**

**doubleclique: Thank you!**

**Zapata: Now I'm quite scared, but I have to say threats do work on me so I probably will keep it up:)**

**TROPPER12: Hahaha, she is a bit of a freak actually...but a cute one, so it's all good!**

**Hotcutii3: Thank you!! And yeah I had lots and lots of birthday cake, chocolate and vanilla...my favorite!! I did feel a bit sick afterwards though lol:)**

**LDfreedomTB: Firstly, thanks for the birthday wishes! Secondly, I'm glad you're enjoying the story so far and I'm hoping I can update more often:) And lastly, you are definitely right about that, I had somebody else point that out to me as well, my mistake...I promise I wasn't drunk when I wrote that chapter:)**

**XSamXStutterzX: I know, I think having something and then losing it has got to be harder than not having something at all, but Spencer lost her sight when she was really young so I'm hoping that she wouldn't really remember too much of what it was like to have sight...hopefully:)**

**chloedarko: Thanks so much:)**

**HaleyxxBrookeAAF: Hahaha, no I actually wasn't thinking that you're a blimp because I'm the same way, I eat all the time because I LOVE food, but I play sports all the time so I stay in shape that way, so send me COOKIES!!**

**Uber-monster: Thank you!! Aaahh...there's always something isn't there, but that one thing is pretty important, I can't say anything because that would ruin the surprise, but it's definitely something that will change the direction of the story...okay I'm not saying anymore:)**

**Pendulum666: Why thank you, I hope you keep reading!**

**charmedcrazy14: Haha, thanks! And trust me I know physical pain, my cramps are killing me right now...oh, too much information right?**


	7. Chapter 7

**So here's the next chapter, thanks to everyone for the reviews, I LOVE them!! I hope you all enjoy this next chapter. Read and Review! I love to know what you guys are all thinking:)**

**Chapter 7**

Ashley left the stage after finishing up her third song of the night to a round of applause. Her eyes were drawn to Spencer who was energetically clapping with a wide grin. Ashley couldn't help but grin too as she left the stage carrying her guitar across her shoulders.

"Ashley Davies?"

Ashley's footsteps halted on the stairs as she looked at the guy she assumed was the scout from the recording company walking towards her.

"Yes?"

"Hi, I'm Paul Blumenthal." He reached out his hand and Ashley shook it. "I watched your performance, and I have to say you have some talent." He smiled.

"Thank you. I really appreciate that." Ashley smiled back.

"I'm with Sony music entertainment. I'd really like to meet up with you so we can discuss a possible future for you as a recording artist with our company."

"Are you serious?"

He handed her his card, and Ashley stared at it blankly, still a little bit awestruck at the opportunity he was presenting before her.

"Give me a call whenever you're ready to talk."

Ashley watched him walk away. She'd known that there was going to be a scout in the audience but she didn't think it would be one from one of the biggest recording companies in the country. It excited her but made her nervous at the same time, what if they wanted her and she didn't live up to their expectations? What if they wanted her to change her music...to be something she was not? All these questions ran through her head as she looked at the card again, the glossy paper smooth under her fingers.

She made her way over to their table, fingering the card in her hands along the way.

"Who was that?" Mark immediately asked her as she sat down, curiosity all over his face.

"The scout, he's from Sony."

"Seriously?! What did he say?"

"He liked the performance. He wants me to call him so we can get together and talk." Ashley continued to play with the card, mentally tracing the letters on it in her head.

"Whoa! That's fucking great Ashley, I've gotta be there! I swear I can negotiate the best deal ever, you'll be famous I swear."

Ashley watched him motion with his hands the way he always did when he got excited, mentally groaning in her head. She hadn't even been offered a deal, the scout only wanted to meet up with her and talk and Mark was already planning out negotiations.

"You don't seem too excited about this, Ashley." Mark stated, taking a sip of his beer and watching Spencer out if the corner if his eye.

"I am... I am. I just, I don't know, it just doesn't feel right and I'm not sure why."

"Well maybe you need to..."

"Hey, can you get us another drink please." Ashley cut him off before he could finish his sentence. She wasn't in the mood for his nagging, and frankly as much as she loved him, his voice was starting to irritate her. He frowned at her, but soon started to cheer up when he looked to Spencer to ask her what she wanted.

"And what can I get you Spencer?" His eyes transfixed on the smooth skin on her melancholy face.

"I'll just have the same thing, thanks."

"Sure thing, Ashley?"

"I'll just have a beer please." Ashley said, suddenly feeling a little bit sorry for cutting him off earlier. It wasn't his fault, he was just trying to help her.

As he was walking away she grabbed his hand and mouthed "Thank you". He smiled and gave her hand a reassuring squeeze. And Ashley looked at Spencer fully for the first time since she'd walked off stage.

"Hey." Ashley said, loving the way Spencer's mouth lifted up into a smile.

"Hey." Spencer turned to her.

"Did you like the show? Ashley asked, a bit self conscious.

"Like it? I loved it. You were amazing Ashley."

"Really?" Ashley grinned.

"Yes, really." Spencer smiled. "Your music, it's just so...it's like your reaching so deep into our souls that the music starts to take on a meaning specific to us. Like the words you're singing are truth, a truth only known to us."

Ashley honestly didn't care what her music sounded like to other people, all she wanted to know was how it sounded to Spencer. And as she was listening to Spencer describe it, she couldn't help but feel like she could listen to Spencer's voice forever, the way words just flowed off her tongue smooth as butter, the raspy tone of her voice that stirred things in her that hadn't ever been stirred before.

"You have a gift Ashley."

Mark returned with their drinks at that moment, but Ashley couldn't take her eyes off of Spencer. The next band was making their way on stage.

"Spencer, do you want to go outside with me." Ashley asked.

"Yeah, sure."

Mark gave Ashley a weird look, like he was seeing a whole new Ashley.

"But this is one of your favorite bands?" He looked at her incredulously.

"I think I can miss one of their shows without dying." Ashley smiled.

Spencer placed her hand in Ashley's as she got out of her chair and Ashley led her out of the bar, happy to just have Spencer close to her. They made their way outside, the streetlights illuminating the streets of New York and giving it a misty look. They stood on the pavement a little away from the entrance to the bar underneath a streetlamp. Ashley still hadn't let go of her hand and didn't seem as if Spencer wanted her to by the way she was rubbing circles on Ashley's hand with her thumb.

They could hear the music coming through the door of the bar.

_All these walls were never really there,_

_Nor the ceiling or the chair._

_I'm eking weeks of peace at the beach,_

_I see the breezes weave the trees,_

_These walls, you'll find, are yours and mine_

_Defined not by them, I_

_I'm in times that lie behind my eyelids,_

_The sunset still the rising silence._

Ashley turned so she was facing Spencer, her body instinctively moving closer to Spencer's. Their bodies were almost touching now, so close that she could feel Spencer's breath on her lips. It was as if their bodies couldn't help themselves, drawn together, their fingers touched and then interlaced.

"Spencer..."

_I'll not feel no fear_

_Cos' I'm not really here_

_I'm nowhere near here_

Ashley moved her hand up to cup Spencer's cheek, watching as she nuzzled her face into her hand, her lips slightly parted.

"Ashley, I..." was puffed against her lips, and Ashley couldn't stop her eyes from closing, her heart from break dancing, couldn't stop the butterflies flying in her stomach as their noses nuzzled.

Eyes falling closed, Spencer's hands clenched tightly on Ashley's tank top, pulling her closer. Ashley closed the distance between their lips, the feeling of Spencer's lips on hers the sweetest thing Ashley could ever have imagined. The feeling of wanting more overcoming them as the kiss deepened and tongues met. And there they stood, under the streetlights of New York, joined together so tightly it was almost as if they were one person.

_All possibilities in each new morning_

_'til satisfied reaching out, yawning_

_Fish in a big dish, some rice and spice,_

_Salt over shoulder, never salted so tight_

_The truth I have told was silence sometimes_

_But who's soul does not hide any crimes_

_Wrapped in walls, encircled by work_

_The walls fall - the story occurs_

_No barrier, or boundary, or allow us ID's_

_The freedom to stay off straight_

_Be fiend, or friend, cause no harm but charm - the peaceful end._

**

* * *

****The song used in this chapter is called "The Escapist" and it's by The Streets off of their new album. All lyrics belong to them:)**


	8. Chapter 8

Okay, so I know I haven't updated in a really long time…please don't kill me. I have a good excuse though!! My incredibly trusty laptop suddenly decided to play games with me last month and since then I've been using a computer which I swear must have been made in the 1950's because it is soooo sloooowwww. But lucky for me, an amazing person managed to repair my laptop which I originally thought was unsalvageable and now I can write to my hearts content! Yessssss! So here's the next chapter:)

**Chapter 8**

Ashley woke up with the ghost of last night surrounding her, the kiss with Spencer, dropping her off in her room, and the way Spencer's lips had lightly brushed her check as she said goodnight. With a smile she hopped in the shower, washing away the smoke of the club from her hair but somehow not being able to wash away the feel of Spencer's skin on her own, Ashley suddenly felt the need to turn the shower head to the coldest setting.

As she was slipping on a white tee and a pair of jeans she heard the unmistakable sound of her ringtone – a sort of screeching of windpipes or something, needless to say it was the most normal ringtone of the generic sounds her phone had been assigned.

"Hello?"

"Big sis! Mark told me all about your big night! How come I didn't get a call? Anyway, I'm so excited for you, I can't wait for your first album to go platinum because then I can meet Justin Timberlake through you. Although his new song's kind of different, not sure if I like it, but he's so cute I don't even think it matters…"

Ashley listened to her sister's excited rambling for a few more minutes before she finally interjected out of the sheer agony of having Kyla talk to her about how much she loved Fergie even if she did like to pee her pants on stage.

"Kyla! Is there perhaps an end to this monologue?"

"Oh…yeah, well I was wondering if you wanted to come and visit soon. I haven't seen you in a while and I though it would be good to have some quality bonding time."

"Umm, I'm not sure if right now's a good time." Ashley said thinking of Spencer.

"It'll only be for a weekend, I miss you. I don't know whether you can feel my tears through the phone but I'm openly crying on the train in front of all these people I don't know because my big sister just told me she doesn't love me!"

Ashley laughed listening to Kyla's fake crying and overly dramatic nature.

"After about five years of not seeing you I can't believe you don't even want to spend a weekend with me, and I'm not gonna stop crying on this phone to you until you tell me something I wanna hear."

"Okay, one, it definitely has not been five years since I last saw you. But alright, just so I can get you off this phone and make sure that the Davies image is not permanently tarnished by your hystericalness in front of all those innocent people, I'll give you a call when I have a date that I can come over."

"Thanks sis, love ya!"

"Love you too."

Ashley smiled at Kyla's antics; it wasn't surprising since she seemed to make it her life's mission to embarrass Ashley as much as she could. Hearing the sound of Anabelle in the kitchen cooking she decided to go out and see if she needed any help. Ashley froze when she spotted Spencer sitting behind the island happily munching on a plate of scrambled eggs. She looked adorable with her hair tied up into a messy ponytail, dressed in a black tank top and boy shorts, eagerly digging into her food. Ashley couldn't help breaking out into a nose crinkling smile at the sight. Anabelle was busy scrambling some more eggs, so Ashley made her way around to the other side of the island to sit next to Spencer. Ashley found herself considerably nervous, and by the way Spencer had stopped digging in and was now trying to eat more ladylike it seemed that Spencer was just as nervous.

"Hi." Ashley said quietly watching Spencer's face.

"Hi." Spencer replied just as quietly.

Anabelle placed glasses of orange juice in front of both of them and then returned with a plate of scrambled eggs for Ashley, placing the plate in front of her.

"You hungry?"

Ashley nodded energetically grinning up at her. Anabelle grinned back at her, internally pleased that she had the power to make even the most stuffed person in the world crave her food and was using that power to draw Ashley in.

"I figured you for a mushroom and spices kind of egg girl, so I threw some in there."

Ashley took a bite, immediately thanking the heavens for endowing this girl with the talent of perfect cooking.

"You were right." Ashley smiled. "It's delicious, thank you."

"You're welcome." Anabelle replied getting back to the stove. "So, how was your night, you two?"

Ashley grinned cutely and replied simply, "It was good."

Spencer was smiling too and had begun vigorously eating her eggs again, "Yeah, it was really good."

They both were smiling that secret smile that seemed to hint that they had a great night together. Anabelle was looking at them, a slight frown on her face that Ashley didn't notice because she was staring intently at Spencer eat. Anabelle directly focused her attention on Ashley.

"Ashley, have you thought much about the conversation we had the other night?"

Ashley's face fell as she recalled it and her chest started to tighten again. The thought of Spencer having some kind of supernatural powers nagged at her, and it was only then that she realized that she'd pushed these thoughts far back into her head, not eager to dwell on it, and in the events of last night forgetting it altogether.

"Um, yeah I've thought about it a bit." Ashley lied.

Spencer had a quizzical look on her face and had stopped eating much to Ashley's disappointment. The tension in the air was obvious, even to Spencer.

"I'm just gonna go grab something from my room," Ashley said, hurriedly getting up hoping to escape any questions Spencer might ask. and made her way through the door into her room.

Suddenly, sitting on the couch in her room she felt tired and was instantly reminded of a time when she felt just as weighed down as she felt at that moment.

_Madison and Ashley were sitting on the hill outside of their school, Ashley was hugging her knees to her chest while Madison had her legs outstretched, leaning back on her arms._

"_I think this might be the year that Aiden asks me to the prom…he was definitely flirting with me in gym class."_

_Ashley just nodded her head, not having the heart to tell her that Aiden had had a crush on Ashley since the ninth grade and everybody in the school knew it. _

"_I think purple for my dress would be good, but…"_

"_Madison." Ashley cut her off._

"_Yeah."_

_Ashley looked down at her feet, fiddling with her fingers._

"_I need to tell you something important, I'm kind of scared though."_

"_What is it? Just tell me."_

"_I…"_

Ashley was interrupted from her train of thought by a knock on the door.

"Come in."

The door opened slightly to reveal Spencer standing nervously leaning on the doorframe.

"Are you free to talk?"

Ashley hesitated for a moment. "Yeah, come on in." She said getting up to help her, both of them not noticing Ashley's guitar strewn across the floor. Spencer started to walk towards the sound of Ashley's voice but ultimately tripped over the guitar. Ashley rushed over to her, catching her before she fell to the ground.

"Are you okay?"Ashley asked holding her up.

"Yeah, I'm sorry, I should have been more aware of my surroundings," Spencer replied blushing.

"No, don't even. It's my fault, I shouldn't just leave things lying around like that." Ashley inwardly cursed at herself, horrified at the thought that something she could do could cause harm to Spencer.

Ashley led her to the couch, taking a seat next to her. They were silent for a while, each of them absorbed in their own thoughts.

"Ashley, if there were something you needed to tell me, you would tell me wouldn't you?"

Ashley looked at her. "If there was something you needed to tell me, would you say it?" Ashley retorted.

Spencer looked decidedly uncomfortable.

"Ashley…I just…I just don't want you to be unhappy here."

"I'm not unhappy here, actually I'm far from it." Ashley replied sincerely.

"That means a lot to me. If you want to talk though, I just want you to know that I'm here to listen…always."

"Well…what if I want to sing horribly, will you listen then?" Ashley replied cheekily, grinning.

"I don't know, it depends. What's in it for me?" Spencer smiled.

"How about I teach you how to play?"

Spencer looked confused.

"Teach me how to play?"

"Yeah, teach you how to play the guitar."

"Oh I don't think that's going to be a good idea, I assure you I will be quite horrible." Spencer laughed.

"Oh, well then I definitely have to see this then…I'm just kidding, just follow my lead and you'll be fine."Ashley said pulling her down to sit cross-legged on the rug.

"Okay just stay here. I'm gonna grab my guitar."

Spencer sat obediently waiting for further instructions. Ashley returned quickly, placing the guitar gently in Spencer's arms before moving to sit behind Spencer, her legs on either side of her. Spencer flushed at the feel of Ashley's warm body against her back.

"Okay, I'm gonna tell you a secret," Ashley said, automatically noticing how husky her voice sounded. "I can't actually read music, I just know what strings are which by the way they sound," Ashley said, placing Spencer's fingers on the strings.

"You create the music with your ears…the way my dad taught me to do it."

Spencer inwardly sighed at the feel of Ashley's slender fingers against her own as they strummed, the feel of Ashley's arms around her made her feel warm and protected. After a few minutes of Ashley guiding Spencer's fingers on the guitar, Ashley let go of the guitar, her hands placing themselves on Spencer's waist.

"Okay, now just play from your heart."

"I don't think it will sound good Ashley." Spencer said worriedly while Ashley smiled.

"Yes it will, just feel the music."

Ashley listened quietly as Spencer started to strum out a melody. It was beautiful, and Ashley couldn't help but close her eyes and hold Spencer tighter as she listened to her play. Ashley opened her eyes slowly when she didn't hear any more playing. Spencer had her face turned towards her and the distance between them was so small that Ashley suddenly found that she couldn't breathe.

"How was that?" Spencer asked breathlessly.

Ashley stared into her eyes, once again mesmerized by how blue they were, her eyes automatically flickered down to her soft lips and back to her eyes again.

"You're a natural." Her voice was rough as she caught the overwhelming urge to kiss her. Ashley's face moved closer, her eyes fluttering shut as she prepared for the feeling of having Spencer's lips on her own.

"Spencer!"

The moment was interrupted by Anabelle's voice. Spencer turned away from Ashley, mentally cursing Anabelle for the interruption.

"I'm in Ashley's room." Spencer called out.

Anabelle entered the room, taking in the scene before her.

"Oh, was I interrupting something?"

"No, you're fine. Ashley was just teaching me how to play the guitar."

"Oh yeah, how'd it go?" Anabelle asked.

"Great. Ashley's an excellent teacher." Spencer smiled and Ashley couldn't help but grin hugely.

"Well, I was just wondering if you wanted to go on one of our famous walks," Anabelle smiled at Spencer, taking a quick glance at Ashley."We haven't been on one in a while and I thought it'd be nice?"

"That would be nice, will you help me get my jacket?"

"Of course," Anabelle replied, moving forward to help Spencer up off the floor.

Spencer turned towards Ashley. "Do you want to come with us?" She asked.

Ashley didn't want to intrude on something that was obviously a tradition for them so she replied no and watched them leave , feeling slightly forlorn at not having Spencer near her, and a little confused as to the way Anabelle was acting. For the past couple of days, Ashley couldn't help but feel that Anabelle for some reason didn't want Ashley to get close to Spencer. Was it because she was trying to protect Spencer? Or was there another reason? Ashley didn't know, but she was determined to find out.

* * *

**Coachkimm: Thank You! Keep Reading!**

**xxMandyxx: I hope you enjoyed this update:)**

**Vanessa Riverton: Sorry it took me so long to update but I'm giving in to your demands and updating soon and often:)**

**To-you-I'm-chained-and-bound: Thanks, I hope you liked this chapter:)**

**Lexj: You're just gonna have to find out, I think it's sure to keep you on your toes though.**

**Careofsoul: I love the mystery behind Spencer too, actually without the mystery I'd probably still love her:)**

**Gentry: Thank you so much!! It's always nice to hear that people think I'm good at something I love doing!**

**FuckinDream: I seriously hope that you didn't get a bad mark on your test because of my story!! Please let me know…I'm anxious. I'm putting all of my energy into sending you vibes that will make you tell me that you aced it.**

**Hotcutii3: All will be revealed, I'm not sure if I can answer any of those questions yet:)**

**Momo The Great: I PMS'ed!! I mean…updated…not the other PMS.**

**Videl1212: Hahaha, glad I could deliver!**

**Ubermonster: Indeed…it begins (insert cackling laughter here). And you don't have to give me cookies because here's an update!!**

**Chloedarko: Thanks, I promise too update more often:)**

**XSamXStutterzX: They love each other!!! I secretly squee anytime I read about Spencer and Ashley kissing!**

**Weightofitall: Yes, unacceptable! Just kidding, I'm glad you're all caught up, well at least I hope you are after my little hiatus. Let me know what you thought of this chapter:)**

**Pendulum666: Heck no that wasn't the end! Still lots more to come so keep reading.**

**Andi957: Thank you, I'm glad you like the direction it's going, hopefully you continue to like it…if not… I will die. Just kidding, but I will have a huge FAIL stamped on my forehead.**


	9. Chapter 9

**Well I hope all of you had a FANTASTIC Christmas and an even better new years:) I personally think I must have gained about 20 pounds from all the food I ate, so it's off to the gym! But before I leave I thought I'd start the year off right with an update, so read and enjoy, and let me know what you think:)**

**Chapter 9**

Paula Carlin arrived back home from her business trip the following morning, and Ashley's carefree interactions in the house seemed to have diminished slightly with her arrival. The sternness that was Mrs. Carlin not only enveloped her being, but seemed to radiate off her in waves that never failed to infect anyone that was near her.

The four of them sitting in the kitchen eating breakfast, the playfulness of the previous morning had all but vanished under the gaze of Mrs. Carlin and Ashley had to be content with just sneaking glances at Spencer from behind her cup of coffee.

"I thought I'd take Spencer to the opera today. There's a brilliant new piece by Marcus Van Buren that was just placed. So don't worry about making us lunch or dinner Anabelle, we're having dinner with a client of mine tonight."

"Okay, Mrs. Carlin."

Ashley was relieved...sad that she wouldn't be seeing Spencer all day, but relieved that the ice cap that seemed to have landed on the house would be gone for the day. She warily took a quick glance at Spencer's face and couldn't help the amused smirk that landed on her face, the look on Spencer's face reminded her of a kid being forced by his parents to go to the dentist.

"Ashley feel free to explore the grounds if you haven't already done so, the town is about two miles from here and there is an extensive array of antiques shops that are very interesting." Paula seemed to be intent on subtly judging Ashley as she spoke.

Ashley nodded politely, she hated to say it but there was no way an antique shop would ever hold her attention. Now if she'd point the way to a place that wasn't filled with things more than a hundred years old, that's including the customers of course, then maybe she'd be entertained...perhaps a mall?

"That sounds good, Mrs. Carlin. I'll definitely see if I can spare some time to go and check them out."

Lies.

From the corner of her eye Ashley could see both Spencer and Anabelle smirking, and felt a little annoyed that they could see right through her and her fake interest in antiques.

Ashley was helping Anabelle clean up in the kitchen when Spencer walked in looking elegant in a simple, knee-length black dress and her hair tied up in a bun. Walking slowly over to them, Ashley marveled at how she always looked so effortlessly attractive, and was surprised to find a hint of jealousy seeping into her as she thought of all the people she would be mingling with, who'd have the chance to admire her all day long.

"Ashley, would you mind walking me out while I wait for my mother?" Spencer asked.

"Not at all." Ashley replied, taking her arm in hers and leading her out the front doors.

They stood on the steps taking in the burst of sunlight that was splashing on them despite the cool weather.

"Okay...so I'm not gonna try and pretend that I wouldn't rather be staying here with you today." Spencer said softly, looking off into the sun.

Ashley's heart stopped. She looked over to Spencer who was still gazing off into the sun and nervously playing with her fingers.

"The other night...when we kissed...it was...well, it was one of the best nights of my life."

Spencer continued breathlessly. "And I'm not sure how you feel about me, but I'm attracted to you, I can't deny that. I can't deny that I get butterflies every time you touch me, that I sometimes want to ask you stupid, random questions just so that I can hear the sound of your voice...that I miss you when I go to bed at night." Spencer said the last part so softly that Ashley almost missed it...almost.

Ashley placed her hand gently against Spencer's face, turning it towards her and gently stroking her cheek.

"Spencer...can we...I mean, will you be with me. I know I'm not good enough for you."

"Ashley..."

"No, I know I'm not good enough for you, I know it. But I wanna try, I wanna be good enough for you because the truth of the matter is I can't stay away from you. I can't really explain the way I feel because it's something I've never been good at, but I think... what I'm trying to say is, will you..."

"Yes."

Ashley beamed at her, slightly mesmerized by the curve of her lips as they curled up into a smile.

"Spencer are you ready to go?"

They were both startled out of their daze by the sound of Paula Carlin behind them.

"Yes, I'm ready." Spencer called out. "I'll see you soon?" Spencer asked leaning almost instinctively closer to Ashley.

"Yeah, you'll see me soon." Ashley smiled.

Ashley watched as Paula lead Spencer down the steps and towards her shiny BMW.

"Have fun at the opera Spencer!" Ashley called out as she was being helped into the car, getting the desired effect of the cute forlorn look reappearing on Spencer's face she made her way back into the house.

"I take it Spencer's not much of an Opera fan then?" Ashley asked Anabelle as she entered the kitchen.

"No not really, she's into softer music. Less loud screaming, more strings and quartets." Anabelle replied, leaning back against the kitchen counter.

"But she's still going?" Ashley asked, eyebrow raised.

"Anytime with her mom is time for Spencer, honestly Mrs. Carlin spends more time on planes than she does with Spencer."

"Why would she do that? Spencer's amazing."

"I know." Anabelle replied after a short pause.

Ashley got the feeling that maybe she had said the wrong thing, and felt a slight flush come over her. She recovered quickly.

"Um, so what are your plans for today?"

"Well I've got to stop in town for a bit to pick up a few things but then after that I'm not really sure." Anabelle said, eyes looking interestedly into Ashley's.

"I was wondering if maybe you wanted to hang out for a bit? I figured I'd try and see if I could finish a couple of songs I've been working on but if you wanna stop by my room sometime if you're free we could watch a movie or something."

"Yeah that sounds good." Anabelle nodded, making her way around Ashley and out the kitchen entrance.

Ashley entered her room with a sense of accomplishment. These past few days she'd had the feeling that Anabelle was being somewhat hostile, but maybe getting to know each other better would help lay those feelings to rest, Ashley certainly hoped so.

* * *

A knock on her door startled Ashley out of her guitar playing, she didn't know how long she had been playing but a quick glance at the clock on the wall told her that it had been more than a couple hours.

"Come in."

"Hey, I brought snacks." Anabelle walked in carrying a tray of pizza and a jug of lemonade.

"You definitely know the way to a girls heart." Ashley laughed.

"Yeah, a lot of people seem to think it's diamonds but I know the stomach's where it's at," she smiled.

Ashley set the things down on the table while Anabelle went to go get some glasses and napkins.

"Did you make this pizza yourself?" Ashley asked as Anabelle walked back into the room.

"Trust me, I make everything myself...because I'm a culinary genius."

"And modest too, I see.." Ashley laughed as Anabelle sat next to her and they tucked into the pizza.

"So, Spencer told me about the potential record deal, are you excited?"

"This is gonna sound kinda stupid, but I honestly don't know. I mean I should be excited, I've been practically waiting for this my whole life."

"Maybe you've been waiting for something else too."

Ashley looked at her, both of them keeping eye contact, silently speaking with their eyes.

"Maybe I have...but how do I know what I really want?"

"Ashley, I can't answer that for you. Sometimes, things, situations, happen and they confuse the hell out of us. But when it comes down to it, we don't always get what we want in life so when the opportunity comes you've got to grab it before it disappears." Anabelle was watching Ashley intently and her gaze wasn't lost on Ashley.

"Ashley...about Spencer..."

"I don't wanna talk about it." Ashley replied quickly.

"You have to talk about it sometime Ashley." Anabelle sighed. "My mom would always say to me "el silencio nunca es facil"

"What does that mean?" Ashley asked.

"Silence is never easy." Anabelle smiled. "Did you ever learn any languages?"

"No!" Ashley laughed. "Let's just say academics wasn't exactly my talent. My mom always told me that if I actually ever tried I could be brilliant. But don't all parents say that to their children?" Ashley smiled.

There was silence for a moment before Anabelle spoke again.

"I think you could be brilliant, and if you wanted something badly enough you'd probably get it. That's what scares me."

Anabelle's comment held Ashley in silence for a moment.

"Why does that scare you?" She asked tentatively.

"What if what you get isn't something I want you to have?" Anabelle replied looking directly at Ashley.

Ashley immediately thought of Spencer, of the new relationship they were starting together.

"What don't you want me to have, Anabelle?"

Anabelle turned away from Ashley, ignoring the question that was asked.

"So, we should probably get started on those movies, which one's first?"

* * *

**Hotcutii3: lol, I'm sorry, I love suspense!**

**Xxashleyluver4lifexX: Thanks! Keep reading, there's gonna be a lot more dimensions to Ashley and Spencer's relationship.**

**Gentry: I know, there's always something getting in the way lol, thanks for the review:)**

**River. R: Thank you! I didn't disappear or anything, I'm just a bit of a procrastinator! Anabelle is definitely intriguing and throughout the next chapters her character will have more light shed on her.**

**xxMandyxx: Hope you enjoyed this update:)**

**XSamXStutterzX: I am back!! Hopefully I can start updating on a regular basis this year!...It's one of my new year's resolutions lol:)**

**Uber-Monster: Anabelle is definitely a character to watch, I think we'll be learning more about her soon.**

**Coachkimm: I hope I'll busy writing updates for all of you guys to read...hopefully:)**

**Momo The Great: Wow, loving the both of them having powers theory...but you're just gonna have to wait and find out:)**

**lexj: No problem, hope you liked this chapter.**

**spashley20: yeah the madison/ashley background story is something to look out for, it'll definitely give you more of an insight into Ashley's past.**

**xEyeKissedAGirlx: Let me know what you thought of this chapter:)**

**Vanessa Riverton: Smexxi!?? Now that's a word I think I'll be using more often lol!**

**Pendulum666: Thank you! I'm glad my laptops back in tiptop condition because I'm seriously a retard without it...as embarrassing as it is to say, I think my computer rules my life!**

**Ivory Slayer: Thanks for the compliment, I appreciate it:)**

**EmOmErMaIdArYel: Glad you liked it!**

**Videl1212: I'm not sure if they really talked about the kiss in this chapter, but I think they've sort of realized what's going on between them so it's kind of a mutual unspoken understanding...if that makes sense.**

**Conscious: I LOVE it when I get comments like yours, it kind of feels good to know that you made someone's day, so thanks!! I hope you enjoyed this chapter:)**

**HaleyxxBrookeAAF: Haha, Anabelle is mine so don't touch! Tsk Tsk, breaking the rules I see lol. Congratulations on making it to the championships, when I played basketball we almost made it to the championships...the key word is almost LOL! As for the Hot Tub Scene, who doesn't love hot girls in bathing suits?:)**

**chloedarko: Yes!! My plan is working! Just kidding, I'm not intentionally trying to kill you with curiosity, but Spencer turning out to not be blind would be pretty funny:)**

**Paulinne-V: Thank you so much!!:) I'm glad you joined to leave me a review, I hope you really enjoyed this chapter and are liking the way the story's going. And your English doesn't suck, it's actually pretty good. My name's Pacita, it's nice to meet you:)**

**charmedcrazy14: lol, thanks. And I can't really blame you for taking a while to review because it takes me forever to update sometimes! Spashley cuteness...all day...every day:)**

**ladytink2011: Thank you, keep reading!:)**

**Bobbyjohn: lol, I'll try to update more often. And thanks for the review, I hope you liked this chapter!**


	10. Chapter 10

**Thank you for all the lovely reviews, they are greatly appreciated and I enjoy reading every one of them, it makes my day! And sorry for the long delays during updates, I suck at getting things done but I promise I'm trying my best to update quicker for you guys. Here's the next chapter, hope you enjoy:)**

**Chapter 10**

_"I need to tell you something important, I'm kind of scared though."_

_"What is it? Just tell me."_

_"I...Madison, I think I'm gay."_

_There was silence, Madison staring shocked at Ashley while Ashley stared at the floor beneath her, hurt pounding._

_"What?" Madison whispered._

_"I'm gay...I like girls, I always have."_

_"But...but, you dated Tom, and Michael, and Josh...you had sex with them Ashley, you can't be gay." Madison looked determined to wipe out Ashley's thought that she was gay out of her head._

_"Yeah, I dated them Madison. Hell I even had sex with them too. But I was never attracted to them the way that I'm attracted to you." Ashley was looking straight at Madison, eyes fixed on hers._

_The stinging smack was unexpected, and Ashley's head reeled from the slap Madison had just fired across her cheek. She held a hand to her cheek, tears blurring her sight. Madison was kneeling in front of her now, her hands holding Ashley's shoulders tight._

_"Listen to me! You are not gay, okay, you're not gay. You're just confused, Ashley, we go to a Catholic school. Being gay doesn't exist for us, it doesn't exist for you and it doesn't exist for me. Everybody has deep feelings for their friends but don't confuse it for anything else, we can help you Ashley, the priests, me, we can help you get back to normal. We can help you Ashley."_

The alarm clock did nothing to faze her, she'd already been awake for a few hours just staring at the ceiling, thinking. There were things that she didn't want to think about that just kept on creeping back into her thoughts, high school was one of them.

She needed to clear her head, so throwing on a pair of shorts and sneakers she decided to go for a run. The light breeze blowing through her hair as she ran through the countryside instantly calmed her. The past wasn't really something she liked to think about too much...too many bad memories.

As she was running back into the driveway she noticed a tall man with blonde hair stepping out of his jeep. Curious, she walked over to his direction. He turned, hearing her walk on the gravel and flashed her a smile.

"Hi, you must be the person that's working with Spencer."

"Yeah, I am...Ashley Davies." She held out her hand for him to shake. "Sorry, it's a little bit sweaty, I just came from a run." She said embarrassed.

"No problem, I'm used to sweat." He laughed.

Ashley looked at him confused, about to ask him what he meant by that when she spotted Spencer standing by the front door, looking beautiful in a pair of tight jeans and a cream, v-neck sweater. She was smiling and Ashley had an insane urge to just grab her and kiss her senseless.

"I thought I heard your voice." Spencer was full out grinning now.

The man turned around to look at Spencer, grinning back. He slowly made his way up the steps and pulled Spencer into a tight hug, arms wrapped around her protectively.

"I was just talking to Ashley over here." He told her once he'd finished hugging her.

Spencer smiled. "Oh yeah, and what have you been telling her?"

"Oh nothing much, just all your most embarrassing stories." He laughed as she swatted him in the arm. "Okay, okay, I was just kidding!"

Ashley had walked up the stairs while they were playing around and was now standing next to Spencer, placing a comforting hand on the small of her back.

"Ashley, this is my big brother, Glen." Spencer said turning towards her. "As you can see he's quite the joker."

"Well, Ashley. I'm looking forward to talking to you more...in private...without Spencer of course."

Ashley laughed. "Sure," she replied. "I'll leave you guys to catch up, I'm gonna go have a shower."

Spencer placed a hand on her arm. "Don't go too far. I want you on my bed." Ashley blushed at Spencer's smirk. "So we can talk without my annoying big brother, obviously." She smiled.

Ashley still a bit preoccupied of visions of the two of them on Spencer's bed just nodded, walking off to her room in a bit of a daze, wondering if Spencer knew exactly what she did to her.

* * *

"I knew I'd find you in here."

"Glen!" Anabelle turned around abruptly, dropping the knife on the counter.

"The one and only." He laughed. "Don't I get any love?" He pouted.

Anabelle smiled and walked over, giving him a huge hug. Glen hugged her back tightly, burying his face into her soft hair.

"I missed you." He murmured into her hair.

Anabelle stiffened slightly and removed herself from his arms.

"Did you eat already?" She asked him, turning back towards the counter she was cutting dough on.

"Yeah, yeah I did, at the airport."

"How long are you staying for?"

"A couple days." He sighed. "I've gotta be back in L.A. before the weekend."

There was an awkward silence only punctuated by the sound of Anabelle cutting the dough up into cubes.

"Do you want some help with that?" He asked quietly.

"No, no I'm good."

"Can you just put that down for a minute." Anabelle reluctantly placed the knife on the counter and turned towards him. "I need to talk to you."

* * *

Ashley tapped lightly on Spencer's door, pleased when she heard her voice softly call for her to come in. She was sitting on her bed reading what looked to be a book in Braille, her fingers moving softly over the contours of the characters. Ashley moved quietly towards her, climbing up onto the bed and sitting next to her.

"What are you reading?" She asked gently.

"Finnegan's Wake." She replied.

"Is it good?" Ashley asked curiously.

"Not good enough to take my attention away from you." Spencer smiled, dropping the book onto the floor.

Spencer's hand slid onto Ashley's thigh as she leaned in closer, gently brushing her nose against Ashley's, loving the way her breathing got heavier. Ashley's eyes fluttered closed and her hand slid up to cup Spencer's face.

"Hi." Spencer whispered against Ashley's lips.

"Hi." Ashley whispered back smiling.

Spencer brushed her lips against Ashley's softly, so feather soft that Ashley almost groaned in anticipation. Spencer's lips moved across to brush against her cheek and then up to her eyelids, and finally back down to her lips, giving her a gentle kiss. Ashley reveled in it, bringing her closer by placing her free hand on Spencer's waist and pulling her closer. Ashley moaned softly when Spencer's tongue slipped out to softly nip at her bottom lip begging for entrance. Ashley let her in easily, letting her tongue slide smoothly across hers. Her heart was beating loudly and all she could think about was how good Spencer felt, how her hand sliding up her thigh was turning her on more than she'd ever been turned on in her life.

Grabbing Spencer's waist she pulled her into her lap wanting to get as close to her as possible, Spencer wrapped her arms around Ashley's neck and slowly started kissing down the side of her neck. Ashley threw her head back, groaning loudly. Spencer's lips on her neck and her wriggling in her lap was driving Ashley crazy. Wrapping her arms around Spencer's back, she laid her down gently onto her back deciding it was time to make Spencer feel what she was feeling. Ashley left a trail of wet kisses down her neck as she watched her intently, she looked beautiful with her mouth slightly parted, eyes closed, back arched. Ashley froze for a minute mesmerized by the sight. Spencer ran her hands through Ashley's hair, then cupping her face and bringing it up to meet her own in a slow kiss. Ashley moved away from the kiss and Spencer's eyes fluttered open, Ashley noticed that they were a darker shade than she had ever seen them.

"We should probably stop shouldn't we." Ashley asked her, a hint of regret in her voice.

"We don't have to if you don't want to." Spencer replied, stroking Ashley's cheek.

"I don't want to rush this...I don't want to rush you." Ashley kissed her cheek. Slightly amazed at herself for having the resolve to stop, she'd never been able to control herself with the other women she'd been with, never. But with Spencer it was different, she wanted everything to be perfect.

Spencer kissed her lightly. "I'm ready whenever you are, Ashley. I'm yours, you can have all of me."

Ashley rolled off her to lie beside her, pulling her into her chest. Spencer started tracing shapes on Ashley's chest, and Ashley was instantly lulled into a sense of peace.

* * *

"Why won't you give me a chance Anabelle! I'll be good to you, I'd do anything for you, you know that." Glen was pleading with her.

"Glen, I can't do this. I'm sorry." Anabelle's eyes were filled with tears.

"I made a mistake, I cheated on you, but that was three fucking years ago! I don't know what else to do to make you see that I'm sorry, Anabelle I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Please let's try again. You were the best thing that ever happened to me and I fucked up. You don't know how many times I've wished I could just go back in time and make sure it never happened."

Glen was standing in front of her now, begging her with his eyes to give him a chance. Anabelle looked at him, her hurt torn because she still had some love for him, they were engaged for goodness sake, there'd always be a part of her that would love him.

"Glen, I don't care about what happened three years ago. It happened, I've forgiven you Glen, but I can't get back together with you."

"Why!? Why, Anabelle? Just tell me!"

"I'm in love with someone else." She said softly.

**

* * *

****Coachkimm: I can't guarantee that she's not gonna be involved in Spencer and Ashley's relationship in some way lol.**

**Spashley20: Haha, yeah I'd probably be like that too, like you'd better tell me before i rip your hair out!**

**Vanessa Riverton: Drama indeed! They're all smexxi though so it's hard not to love it:)**

**Gentry: Hmmm...looks like you're gonna have to wait and see lol!**

**ashnspence4ever: Thanks, hope you liked this update:P**

**EveryVillainIsLemons44: I know! I think "The Escapist" is the best song they've ever recorded too, I'm glad you liked it with the story, and of course I've got to give you kudos for having good taste in music lol!**

**lisbet0153: Thank You! I'll try to update more often for you:)**

**xxMaNdyxx: Hope this chapter was good for you!**

**XSamXStutterzX: Hahaha, I agree! It's good to be back and read your reviews:)**

**chloedarko: Hope the gym went well for you, mine was a disaster lol, was sore for days afterwards! I've realized that's what happens when I don't work out regularly ha! **

**mini200do: Thanks, keep on reading:)**

**xEyeKissedAGirlx: Yep, she definitely got up the courage to ask and do a lot more than that in this chapter too haha!**

**Videl1212: Hmmm...I like your theory. There's a lot of background history in each of the characters, they'll all be revealed but bit by bit.**

**Pendulum666: Thanks for the cookie! Can I get another one?**

**Hotcutii3: Yes, we have a love/hate relationship lol. And as for your question, sorry can't answer that, but you'll find out soon enough. Don't hate me please:)**

**areader96: Thank You. And thanks for reading and reviewing!**

**Paulinne-V: I hope this update had a good Spashley moment for you lol. Unfortunately, I don't speak Spanish, I have a minimal amount of knowledge in the language but I really want to learn because honestly i think Spanish is a really sexy language:) You should leave me some reviews in Spanish...maybe i'll pick something up lol!**

**ladytink2011: Hahaha, a Beast!! Pretty harsh...but honestly who wouldn't want Spencer.**


	11. Chapter 11

**Thank you once again for all the reviews, I can't tell you how much they boost my day and help validate to me that I'm not an utterly crap writer, which I think I am a lot...usually during the times when I have writer's block or when the words just don't seem to be appearing on the screen the way I want them to lol. Anyway I'm gonna try and put out a few chapters close to each other mainly because i'm in England at the moment and life's getting pretty busy with schoolwork and such, so hopefully the chapters will keep you going for a bit before I next update. Here's the next chapter:)**

**Chapter 11**

"Who is it?" Glen demanded looking like he'd just got his heart crushed.

"Glen...I can't...I can't tell you."

"For God's sake all I want to know is his name, I think I at least deserve that!"

"You deserve it?" Anabelle looked incredulous. "Really? You don't deserve anything from me Glen. I loved you...I loved you, and you broke my heart. And I've forgiven you but you don't own any part of me anymore, you lost that right a long time ago."

Glen just looked at her, tears welling up in his eyes, anger mounting up inside from knowing that she no longer loved him the way he loved her, and not knowing who had taken his place. He finally left the room leaving Anabelle to her own thoughts.

* * *

"So, are there any other siblings I should know about?" Ashley asked, grinning at Spencer.

"I'm sorry." Spencer smiled. "I guess these are things we should know about each other. I've just been so wrapped up in you, in us, that I never really thought about talking about my family."

They were still lying in bed, Spencer snuggled into Ashley's chest and Ashley gently stroking her hair.

"It's okay. I guess I haven't really talked much about my family either, actually I don't think I've talked much about anything except you and music." Ashley chuckled.

"Well it's never too late to start. I want to know everything about you Ashley Davies." Spencer said, snuggling closer into Ashley's warmth.

"There's not really much to tell, I was born and raised in L.A, mom sent me to a catholic boarding school when I was ten with my stepdad's money, dropped out when I was 17, found out I had a half sister and moved to New York."

"What about your dad?"

"He...he died."

Spencer took Ashley's hand in her own and gently stroked it with her thumb.

"Ashley...I'm sorry. Were you close?"

"Yeah, he was my best friend growing up. He died from cancer when I was six, and then my mom married a millionaire and shipped me off to boarding school because he didn't like kids."

"That's awful, so she chose him over you?"

"Basically, but when I think about it if I hadn't gone to boarding school and then dropped out, I wouldn't be here with you right now. I don't regret a thing."

Ashley could feel Spencer smiling into her chest.

"So, Ashley. Do you have some extravagant middle name I should know about, like Delmu or Waluta?"

Ashley laughed. "Delmu? No, mine's as average as they get...Anna. Pretty extravagant huh? I'm guessing yours is Waluta?"

"Close." Spencer replied sarcastically. "It's Mia, that's pretty average too I guess."

"Mia? Your middle name's Mia?" Ashley asked, surprised.

"Yes. What's wrong?"

Spencer brows were furrowed in concern.

"Nothing...it's silly. Just something I remember from when I was a kid. What about your family? Any scary aunts with mustaches?"

Spencer smiled wistfully. "Not that I know of, it was just me, mom, dad, and my two brothers growing up. My dad and Clay died when I was four. I don't really remember much, but I'll always remember the look on my mom's face when the policeman told her what had happened. She looked like her heart had been crushed into pieces, I'll never forget that."

"Ashley...it was my fault."

Ashley looked down to see that Spencer was softly crying.

"Spencer. Look, I know...I know you might feel like it was your fault but you can't blame yourself like that, you were only a kid, none of it was your fault."

"You don't understand..."

Ashley was wiping away her tears with her fingers, while Spencer clutched on to her tightly.

"Spencer, I do, I do. I know that you predicted it happening, Anabelle told me."

Spencer sat up abruptly moving slightly away from Ashley, missing her warmth immediately.

"So you know that I'm a murderer then. That I could have stopped it from happening if I'd just told someone, that maybe even it was me that caused the accident with this...this power that I have inside of me that won't let me go, that took away the things I loved most."

Spencer looked devastated, arms folded into herself, closed off from everything. And Ashley didn't know how to approach her, how to get close without getting burned.

"You were just a kid..."

"I could have saved their lives! Do you understand that? I could have saved them."

Spencer was sobbing heart wrenching tears, and Ashley made a move to embrace her, her own heart breaking at the sight of Spencer in pain, but was pushed away.

"Spencer, I'm not gonna let you do this to yourself. Come here." Ashley pleaded.

"No! You shouldn't be near me, this was a mistake, I can't let you get hurt."

"I'm not going to get hurt! Let me take care of you."

"I don't want you to take care of me. I just...can you just leave, I need to be alone."

Ashley looked at Spencer, tears shining in her eyes, wondering how it had gotten to this. Not understanding why Spencer wouldn't let her touch her, wondering if Spencer even wanted to be with her anymore. And that thought was killing her.

"Spencer..."

"Ashley, I don't want you near me."

Ashley felt like someone had just punched her in the gut. She had no idea how much such simple words from Spencer's lips could hurt. The agony of not being able to talk to her and the pain of thinking that maybe Spencer didn't like her anymore, boiling up into complete frustration.

"Okay, Spencer. Whatever you want."

Ashley got off the bed and walked out the door, leaving Spencer on the bed crying softly. Her frustration was slowly turning into anger as she stormed past Anabelle and into her room.

"Ashley?"

She heard Anabelle call out her name, but ignored it. She'd never felt so hurt and angry at the same time in her life. And she was finding it hard to think clearly when the only thing that kept on replaying in her mind was Spencer telling her she didn't want to be near her. She needed to get out of here. The card on the coffee table was drawing her attention, and she hesitated before picking it up. Grabbing her phone from the table she dialed the numbers on the card quickly.

"Hi Paul. It's Ashley Davies. I was wondering if we could set up a meeting...I'm ready to talk."

* * *

**I hope nobody hates me for writing this chapter...but it had to be done:)**

**lisbet0513: I am pretty busy, but i love writing this story a lot so i'm definitely trying to make more time for it.**

**Paulinne-V: Surprisingly, I think i got the gist of what you wrote in Spanish. Did you say that you liked the chapter, and you were happy to read it, it's one of your favorite stories and you hope i update soon. Big hugs and many blessings? Am i right?**

**Vanessa Riverton: Hahaha, I would totally jump Ashley first too!**

**chloedarko: Oh the suspense!**

**madridcc: Whoa, just gonna have to wait and see:)**

**angelperry7: Thank you, new reader! I'm glad you're enjoying it!**

**ilovespencer: lol, yeah i definitely wouldn't blame her.**

**spashley20: haha, yeah that does sound a bit bad, but Glen's a good guy, they would have made a good couple.**

**Uber-Monster: Don't worry, I think everybody has a 99.8 percent chance of being wrong...including me:)**

**xEyeKissedAGirlx: She probably should have settled for Glen, but she's not going to, who would really if you had Spencer and Ashley lol**

**Coachkimm: Thank you. A little more back story in this chapter too, obviously not all good but it adds to the story.**

**areader97: hahaha!**

**just keep breathing: Thank you so much, I appreciate it:)**

**mini200do: More Spashley! This chapter probably wasn't what you were hoping for but i hope you liked it anyway.**

**Bobbyjohn: lol, thanks, i think?**

**Gentry: I'm pretty terrible at waiting too, but i still make other people wait. I know, I'm a horrible person:)**

**seyheystevierey: You're right! There wasn't any mention of Glen before, they just never really got round to talking much about themselves with everything else that was going on.**

**Momo The Great: Anabelle is a bit of a tease:)**

**XSamXStutterzX: Yeah it makes sense. I get that sometimes too! Ha, if I didn't already love spencer and ashley together, I think i would feel bad and hook her up with one of them, she's still a pretty cool character. Not as cool as Spashley though ahahaha!**

**Hotcutii3: I checked out your story and you've definitely got high school down lol! Keep it up, I'm looking forward to reading more:)**

**orgy123: Thanks! I hope it stays one of your favorites:) I really like the ideas that you have for your stories as well, definitely original and they keep me entertained!:)**

**ladytink2011: I'm glad you taught me what beast means, so I don't look like an idiot if somebody uses it on me again lol!**

**Videl1212: Here you go! Hope this chapter wasn't too bad for you!**

**lojones38: I'm happy you like this:)**

**charmedcrazy14: Oh, Spencer's secret...definitely something to look out for, and worth the wait:)**


	12. Chapter 12

**Once again sorry for the delay in updating, thanks for the reviews I read every single one of them and you guys never fail to disappoint me with your insight, humor, and flattery skills lol. Hope you enjoy this chapter:)**

**Chapter 12**

_"What's going on?"_

_Ashley looked around the room, taking in the sight of the two priests standing next to her best friend Madison._

_"Ashley, we're all here to help you. Even Madison, we have a great therapy program that will help you overcome this burden that you're carrying." The priest directed his words to her._

_"I'm sorry, but I don't need therapy. Madison, come on." Ashley gestured to her best friend to follow her out the door. She wasn't moving and Ashley noticed there were tears in her eyes._

_"Ashley, Madison's not coming with you. Now you need our help, you need God's help, and we're offering it to you right now...I'm afraid that if you refuse...we will have to expel you from this school."_

_Ashley looked to her best friend, her eyes pleading for support._

_"Madison?"_

_"I'm sorry, Ashley. I love you, but I can't." She was crying._

_Ashley's heart constricted. She'd never felt so betrayed...and so alone. She walked out of the church doors, tears clouding her vision as she left her best friend behind._

"Ashley Davies?"

Ashley shook herself out of her memories as she looked towards the receptionist behind the desk.

"Yes?"

"You can go in now." She smiled.

"Thank You."

Ashley walked into the room, chocolate eyes surveying the scene, pictures of artists and platinum records were covering the office walls, from Shania Twain to Alicia Keys. It had been a week since her fight with Spencer and they still hadn't talked. Spencer had left immediately after their fight with her mother to spend time with relatives in The Hamptons. And now here she was, ready to talk music in the office of one of the biggest music producers in the industry.

"Have a seat Ashley. I've been looking forward to meeting you."

* * *

She left the office more excited than she'd ever been in her life, but also more confused. He'd offered her a music deal, the whole bang, album release, tours, music videos, everything she's always wanted. But the thought of Spencer kept nagging at the back of her head. Spencer hadn't even wanted to talk to her, she just up and left without a word, Spencer probably didn't even want to be with her anymore but yet here she was still thinking about her. Still making her a factor in making one of the biggest decisions of her life. And it was making her angry, making her feel like the biggest fool in the world.

She was still contemplating all of this when she opened the door to her room, only to find Spencer sitting on her couch. Spencer, hearing the door open turned towards her. The shock of seeing her there froze Ashley still. She'd only come back to pack up her things and leave, it was obvious to her that she wasn't needed anymore and it hurt too much being in that house. She'd already made all the arrangements, calling her sister to ask if she could stay with her for a bit while she figured out what she wanted to do. There wasn't really much to figure out, she was going to take the record deal...there was nothing holding her back.

"Hey"

Ashley could only just stare at her, still a bit shocked to find her sitting on her couch after a week of no word. She finally recovered enough to reply.

"Hey"

"Sorry, I didn't mean to just barge in here like that..."

"Spencer, why are you here?" Ashley cut her off.

"This room smells like you."

"You know that's not what I meant. You've been gone for a week, no call, no word from you, and all of a sudden here you are...in my room."

Ashley moved closer to her, stopping short when she got a better look at Spencer's face. She looked tired, and Ashley couldn't help but feel compassion for her.

"I needed to see you."

"I'm leaving Spencer."

"What?" Spencer's hands were folded in her lap, she looked so weak and vulnerable that Ashley sat down next to her on the couch, willing herself not to cry.

"I'm leaving. You don't need me, Spencer. I want you to be happy more than anything, and I don't think I'm what's gonna make you happy."

"You're wrong." Spencer was adamant. "I'm sorry, I needed to get away, time to think. There's so much going on, so much I want to tell you."

"Then tell me." Ashley said softly.

"I'm scared, I'm so incredibly scared of hurting you. I just wish things could be simple, I left you thinking it would be easy. That if I could be away from you for a month then I would be able to stay away from you forever. I couldn't even manage a week, Ashley. All I ever thought about was you, how much I miss you...it was driving me crazy. I can't live without you Ashley, I know I should and I'm being selfish keeping you here with me, but I can't do it. I need you, I need you so much it hurts."

The tears were falling now and Ashley was making no moves to stop them. She didn't want to leave. She needed Spencer just as much as Spencer needed her.

"I'm not going anywhere." Ashley pulled her into a tight hug, kissing her hair as she felt Spencer's tears on her neck.

"I need to tell you something." Spencer murmured into her ear.

"Ssshh, not now, I don't need to know anything right now."

"Ashley you do, I need you to know this before you decide to be with me." Spencer sounded frustrated.

"I don't need anything to help me decide to be with you. I'll always be with you, it's not a choice for me."

"Ashley, please..."

"Okay, one month. Tell me in one month and I'll let you know how I feel about it then."

"Ashley..."

"One month."


	13. Chapter 13

**I love reviews, almost as much as I love chocolate, the key word is almost because I really, really love chocolate lol. And just a quick note, the chapters are getting a bit shorter because I don't want to pack too much into one chapter because it kind of takes away from what I'm trying to get across in that chapter, so sorry in advance for people who love long chapters:) Okay, well here's the next one, its fast forwarded one month from the last chapter.**

**Chapter 13**

They lay in their favorite spot, the secret garden, Spencer resting her head on Ashley's chest, arm draped across her waist. Ashley closed her eyes, feeling the warmth of the sun on her face and smiled. Things had been going really well for them, in all honesty Spencer didn't need her help getting around anymore, but Ashley liked to pretend that she did. It gave her more opportunities to hold her hand without having to answer any questions, Spencer's mom still didn't know they had been dating and Ashley was just waiting for Spencer to get comfortable enough to tell her. Anabelle knew of course, and besides acting a bit strange for the first couple of weeks, she seemed to be taking it in her stride.

She'd turned down the record deal. She smiled to herself when she remembered the look on the guys face when she told him she didn't want it. He must of thought that she was crazy, but she didn't care, she had everything she needed right here. She hadn't told Spencer, and she honestly wasn't planning to. She didn't want Spencer feeling guilty that she'd given it all up for her.

"Ashley..."

"Mmm." Ashley kept her eyes closed, lazily running her hand through Spencer's hair.

"It's been a month."

Ashley's hand momentarily halted before she started stroking again. She wasn't sure why she didn't want to have this conversation, she knew that nothing could ever change the way she felt about Spencer, nothing. But her gut was telling her that whatever Spencer wanted to tell her, she wasn't going to like it, and she wasn't sure if she was ready to hear it.

"Ashley, I..."

"Oh, there's something you're gonna love, come on."

Ashley got up abruptly, effectively interrupting Spencer. She grabbed Spencer's hand and pulled her up, leading her away from the garden and into a clearing. They had been there before, but this time Ashley took her right to the edge of the lake.

"I don't know why, but you can only hear this when the sun is out." Ashley stood behind Spencer, placing her arms around her waist and resting her chin on her shoulder.

"Do you hear it?" Ashley nuzzled her nose against Spencer's cheek.

"Yeah...it sounds like someone singing. It's beautiful."

"There's this story. My dad used to tell it to me when I was little. It was about this angel of death, and God sends her down to earth to take someone's life. This woman whose life she's supposed to take, her name hasn't been put in the book of life, and so she's be forced to spend one year in hell before she can come up to heaven. But see when the angel gets there, she ends up falling in love with the person that she's supposed to kill, and the woman she's supposed to kill falls in love with her too. "

"What happens?"

"Well, God gives her a choice. Either she kills the woman she loves and comes back up to heaven to live in peace. Or she is banished from heaven, never to come back, and is forced to live a human life, allowing the woman she loves to live and not die, but erasing all traces of their complete love for each other out of their minds."

"What does she choose?"

"She chooses to suffer a life of human existence without the love of her life. She loved her so much that she couldn't bear the thought of her having to suffer through the horrors of hell, even if it was only for one year."

Spencer's hands tighten on Ashley's as she leans her head back.

"That's so sad." Spencer whispers.

Ashley held her tighter, her heart never feeling so full, so ready to be open. She felt like that angel of death, willing to do anything to protect the one she loved.

"Spencer, I love you."

Ashley felt Spencer's chest heave under her fingers, stepping in front of her, hands on Spencer's arms, she saw that Spencer was crying. Ashley started wiping her tears away with her thumb.

"Why are you crying?"

Spencer placed her hand on Ashley's cheek, gently stroking the soft skin there.

"I love you, Ashley. I love you so much."

Ashley kissed her then, softly. Her tears mingling with the taste of her mouth, as Spencer clung desperately to her.

* * *

They made it back to Spencer's room, the air thick with anticipation. Ashley knew what was coming, she was going to hear what Spencer had waited a month to tell her. She knew nothing could keep her from being with Spencer, but she still couldn't help that twinge of fear that she felt in her heart that was telling her that what Spencer had to say was going to change things. She was nervous now, fiddling with the curtain on the window while Spencer stood by the door.

Ashley turned around and looked at Spencer, taking in her tear filled eyes...her heart hammered in her chest.

"Ashley...I'm dying."

Her heart stopped beating. She couldn't speak. She didn't know how long she'd been standing there just looking at Spencer before she managed to say something.

"No...no, you're lying."

"Ashley listen to me. I have this disease, I've always had it. I shouldn't have even lived this long, the doctors..."

"Shut up!"

"...the doctors say I have at the most two months left to live."

"No! No, you're wrong."

Ashley was filled with an anger she didn't even know she possessed. Grabbing the nearest thing to her, which just happened to be a chair, she threw it against the wall smashing it to pieces. It didn't satisfy the pain and anger that was overwhelming her, making it harder for her to breathe. How could she be dying? She suddenly felt like throwing up. How could she finally find something worth living for only to have it taken from her so quickly. The frustration was building up inside her again and she started violently kicking the table.

"Ashley, stop." Spencer's plea came out strangled, her heart breaking at the sight of Ashley so torn.

Ashley strode over to Spencer, cupping her face gently in her hands.

"Why are you lying to me?"

"Ashley..."

Ashley placed her hands on Spencer's waist, backing her up roughly against the wall she started kissing her passionately, fueling all of her pain into the kiss. Spencer's arms immediately went up around Ashley's neck, holding her to her body tightly. Ashley's lips moved down to her neck, kissing the skin there softly and slowly moving down.

"Stop lying to me."

"I would never lie to you Ashley."

Ashley roughly tore open Spencer's shirt, and Spencer let out a sharp gasp. She started kissing her way down Spencer's chest feeling it heave under her lips.

"Lie to me, just this once...please, lie to me." Ashley begged, softly kissing Spencer's stomach.

And there, on her knees, he head resting tightly against Spencer's stomach, with Spencer's fingers gently running through her hair...she finally cried.

* * *


	14. Chapter 14

**Thank you for all the reviews!! I know you guys are a bit upset at the thought of Spencer dying, but trust me, everything works out for the best in the end. There's only a few more chapters left in this story so I hope you all enjoy the last few chapters:) Read and Review!!**

**Chapter 14**

Over the next month Ashley spent every waking moment with Spencer, taking her to places she'd always wanted to go, talking all night, Ashley wanting to know everything about Spencer, her first memory, her favorite book, what she loved most.

Sometimes she'd stay awake all night just watching her sleep, wanting to etch every detail of her into her memory, not wanting to tear her eyes away from her, afraid that it might be the last time she'd see it. She'd always be tired in the morning, shrugging off Spencer's worried questions and dragging her out to their favorite spot, tickling her mercilessly for no other reason than to hear her laugh.

Spencer's mom knew about them, and although it was hard at first for her to accept, she'd come to appreciate Ashley's company, finding it hard herself to cope with the idea of losing her daughter. Glen came over a lot too, and they'd all get together and lounge around outside, cracking jokes, and listening to Anabelle talk about meaningless things. And it was at these times that Ashley knew Spencer was most happy.

**Ashley's POV**

I watch her from the doorway, my eyes squinting through the sun I can see Spencer dancing in the garden. She looks beautiful with the sun shining on her skin, laughing with her head thrown back. My heart breaks. Damn it, the tears are falling down my face again. I'm so sick of crying. It's all I do, when Spencer's asleep, in the shower where she can't hear me. I have to go back inside, I can't bear to look at her so happy when I know I won't be able to see her like this forever.

I walk back inside, only to come face to face with Anabelle. We exchange looks, and somehow I just instinctively know what she's feeling...because I'm feeling the same way. She pulls me in for a hug and I just let it all go, sobbing onto her shoulder and holding her tight.

* * *

"Spencer?" I called out tentatively as I stepped into her room.

"Yes."

I shut the door behind me and step forward. Spencer is laying on the bed, fully clothed, and on top of the covers. Her back to me facing the window. "We need to talk."

"What's there to say." She muttered.

I perch myself on the edge of the bed behind her and place a hand on her arm.

"Whatever needs saying, Spencer. Whatever you're sad or angry about. You won't heal until you do."

"Fine. I _am_ angry. I'm angry at myself for falling in love with you. I'm angry at the fact that I couldn't push you away when I needed to, that I'm making you go through all of this. And I'm sad that I'm not going to get the chance to grow old with you."

Tears sprang to my eyes and I tugged them down, placing my hand on Spencer's face and forcing her to turn my way.

"Spencer, you're forgetting one thing."

"What's that?"

"I love you." I couldn't stop the tears from falling now. "And I'm happy for any time spent with you, no matter how short it is, because I wouldn't be living if I had never met you. My life would mean nothing without you."

A convulsive shudder went through me as she wrapped her arms around me in a tight hug, as if to reassure me silently that I wasn't alone. And it seemed like the most natural thing in the world to brush my lips against her hair a few times, my hands moving in small, idle patterns on her back.

And then she took my hand and placed it on her breast.

She flattened herself against me and kissed me then, her lips soft and undemanding but somehow persuasive at the same time. Persuasive...and... seductive. The feel of her pressed against me and her lips against my own was driving me crazy. And suddenly I'm on top of her, feeling every contour of her body.

"Ashley...make love to me."

My heart stops altogether. And then starts back up, beating faster than it's ever beaten before.

"Are you... are you sure about this?"

She didn't answer my question in so many words, but what she did say made sure that I knew her answer. "I want you, Ashley."

I'd never thought that my body could react to words alone, but it did, god did it react.

* * *

She had kissed her before, countless times now, and touched her as well...but there was something different in this kiss now. She kissed her and kissed her and kissed her, both of them naked; her lips never leaving Spencer's, even as she pushed her backwards onto the pillow, her body moving slightly so that she was half-lying beside her and half-lying on top of her.

She finally lifted her lips from hers to stare down at her, her breath coming fast and hearing her quickened breathing as well. It was too dark to see her, just a somewhat darker shadow where she knew she was. She wished for a moment that she could see her but after all, it didn't matter that much. It was true that not being able to see somehow intensified all the other senses.

She lowered her lips to her again, but didn't kiss her, at least not on the lips, she traced a path down the line of her chin and her throat, pausing at the hollow of her throat to dart her tongue out and taste her skin. She knew her taste now, a hint of vanilla.

She gasped, arching her neck as her neck fell back to allow Ashley greater access, her hands moving in restless motions all over Ashley's body. Ashley was leaving a slightly damp trail of kisses down the valley between Spencer's breasts and further down her stomach, Spencer running her fingers through Ashley's hair as she went down.

"Ashley..." She gasped.

Ashley paused in her exploration of her body, rearing up on her hands to gaze up her body to where she knew her face was. She couldn't see her, but she knew what she would look like, could picture it, her eyes dark and dilated with lust, her face flushed, her lips swollen and slightly parted. "God...you're so beautiful." She found herself breathing.

Spencer let out a small, incredulous laugh. "You can't see me...can you?"

Ashley smiled.

"No but I don't need to see you to know it. I can feel it and I just _know..."_

Spencer sighed softly, just a breath of air slipping out from between her lips and her hands moved to Ashley's shoulders and up to tangle in her hair, gently tugging to bring her back up. She ignored the invitation for a moment and instead lowered her lips back to her skin, kissing her stomach, breathing in the scent of her.

She let out a sound halfway between a gasp and a moan, her hips bucking, and Ashley made her way back up her body, her lips and hands rediscovering all the territory she'd already learned.

She knew the sound she made, the little gasp, as she entered her, the feeling of her surrounding her fingers. Spencer's nails dug into her skin, her hands clutching her, her legs around Ashley's hips urging her on deeper into her.

"Ashley..."

Just one word, just her name, but she made it more than that. She made it beautiful.


	15. Chapter 15

**So, sorry this update took a while. I have no excuses lol, I feel kinda bad that the chapters just seem to keep getting sadder, so I apologize for that. Thank you all for the lovely reviews, I'm glad you're still reading. Thanks! Here's the next chapter:)**

**Chapter 15**

Fate had woven them into a complicated web of red thread. Each moment was twisted and knotted in such a way that separation was simply not an option. But she had to go and Ashley had to give her the support- with strength and with her heart.

_Her heart_, she mused unconsciously clutching at her nightgown.

"Ashley," Spencer murmured softly. She shifted slowly and propped her head on one hand, reaching out with her other to entwine her fingers with hers.

"I need you," she murmured, bringing Ashley's hand to her lips. "I need you to be ready, Ashley. I need you to be ready for whatever is coming."

Ashley said nothing, for there was nothing to be said. Spencer was seeking reassurance from her presence at the moment.

"I'm sorry."

Ashley was startled out of her thoughts as the bed shifted and she was swept into Spencer's embrace. She trembled. It was amazing that at even the slightest touch, she had forgotten how to breathe.

" I'm sorry," she whispered. "I'm sorry. I can't- you deserve better than this."

Ashley shook her head.

"Promise me."

Spencer was startled, her hand stopped on Ashley's pulled her closer, nuzzling her hand.

"Promise me."

"Promise you what?" Spencer asks.

"Promise me that you'll find your way back to me no matter what the circumstances."

Ashley licks her lips and her heart is pounding. They're just words, but the meaning is so much more. Promises were enough for now.

"I promise," she smiles.

* * *

Ashley had been staring at the blank wall in Spencer's room for like an eternity. Spencer had long gone to bed and now was sleeping restlessly in her space on the other side of the bed. The house refused to lose the aura of misery that wanted to surround it indefinitely.

There was something about this house at the moment, something that was eternally miserable. It was as if the house itself took pride in manipulating the grief of those who lived within it with a sickening glee. The words _too late_ seemed to hover above Ashley's head as she looked over at Spencer sleeping.

_"Do you love me?"_

There was something in the way Spencer had asked her the question tonight. She had immediately recognized the desperation in her voice, but the desperation itself merely served as a layer to the dark and complex emotions underneath it. This notion alone unnerved her recognized her desperation, knew that she fought to control her emotions. It frightened her that they were quickly nearing the bursting point. But what terrified her more was that Spencer felt that she had to fight alone.

She shook her head. Surrounding herself with these thoughts would only serve to feed the misery, it would be best if she got some water and went back to her room to try to sleep.

Reaching the kitchen, she began to quietly search for glass in the cupboards, cringing each time an obnoxious squeak permeated the sullen silence of the household.

"You know, late night snacking is bad for your health."

She jumped, nearly dropping a glass she had found onto the floor. Turning around, she saw Anabelle standing in a tank top and sweatpants, looking like she hadn't slept in days.

"Scared you?"

"More like startled me," she said, filling her glass with water. "Don't do that. It's bad enough that this house is totally creepy at night."

"Sorry."

She set her glass down and whirled around, now curious as to why she was down there so late as well.

"Hey...do you wanna talk about things. I think you could use it." Ashley asked, concerned.

"No... Look Ashley, you may feel the need to ramble about everything you feel, but I don't. And I'm not going to have a heart to heart with you of all people."

Ashley's fists clenched angrily at her side.

"What is wrong with you? All you ever do is give me hot and cold. One minute I think everything's fine and _actually_ believe that we're friends, and the next minute you're spewing daggers at me. I don't know whether you like me or hate me and it's confusing the hell out of me!"

Ashley was in her space now, finally confronting Anabelle about her attitude towards her.

"Which is it Anabelle, which is it? Tell me what it is about me that you hate."

"Damn it Ashley! I'm in love with you...I'm in love with you. I always have been."

Ashley stopped short, not really believing what she was hearing. Anabelle was in love with her?

"But you're in love with Spencer. And you have no idea how much that hurts, to watch the two people you care about most in the world be in love."

"Anabelle..." Ashley started, watching her wipe away the tears on her face.

"No, let me finish...I wanted to hate Spencer for taking you, for taking the one thing I've ever truly wanted in life. For taking you, Ashley. But I could never hate her, believe me I tried...I love her too much."

The tears were coming down faster now, and Ashley didn't know what to do. For the first time in her life, she had no idea what to say.

"And then I wanted to hate you. I wanted to hate you for coming into our lives and making us fall in love with you. So I tried to push you away, I tried, but every single time I'd be drawn back to you by some indescribable power. I couldn't keep away."

Anabelle was looking at Ashley intently now, finally letting out all the feelings she'd kept in for so long, finally letting Ashley know how she felt.

"The worst part is, I think if Spencer wasn't in the picture I might have actually had a chance."

Anabelle gave her a slight smile before turning around and walking towards the door, Ashley was still standing in silence, her brain trying to process everything she'd just heard.

"Anabelle, wait!"

"No, Ashley. I'm leaving. I have to go, I can't keep doing this to myself anymore. Bye Ashley."

Ashley watched her leave, saddened by the fact that she'd broken Anabelle's heart. And realizing that the events surrounding her arrival had left shattered hearts in her wake.


	16. Chapter 16

**Sorry for the long time between updates, finals are finally over, so just finishing up a few bits and bobs over here and then I will be officially free for the summer! So now that I have a lot more free time, I thought I'd grace you all with an update. Thank you all for the reviews, as I think I've told you before, they make me very happy, and I'm glad that you take the time out to read and review. I appreciate that:) This is the last little author's note I'm gonna leave you guys, so I wanna thank EVERYBODY for reading my story. Stay tuned for the next chapter, and look out for a new story I'm developing called **_**"The Truth about Love" **_**and of course I plan on completing **_**"Keeping Numb"**_** so keep an eye out. Thank you all:)**

**Chapter 16**

"She's in love with you?"

"That's what she said. I just wasn't expecting that, you know."

"I don't even know what to tell you."

"The funny thing is, this whole time I thought she was in love with Spencer."

"Ashley what are you going to do? I mean do you plan on telling Spencer?"

"No, no I can't. I don't want to put this on her now, I don't want her to be worrying about anything right now, Kyla."

"But what about Anabelle? Do you think that she'd say something to Spencer?"

"I don't know...I hope not. I wouldn't be able to deal with that, I'm just so tired. All I can think about is Spencer, I've called every hospital in the country hoping that there may be someone, anyone that can help her. But nothing, Kyla, fucking nothing. I don't know what to do anymore...I'm lost."

"Ashley, it'll be okay. You've got to be strong for her, don't give up hope, she needs you so much right now. I've been talking to a few people myself, and there's this doctor, he's not a traditional doctor, he practices herbal and spiritual medicine. And I know it sounds a bit wacky, but I explained Spencer's condition to him and he thinks he may be able to help. He's helped heal people who were terminally ill before, and he seems really genuine, I figured, I don't know, maybe...I mean, you don't have to..."

"When can you get him down here?"

"Ashley, I don't want you to get your hopes up..."

"I don't care! Just...please, get him down here. I'll try anything, I just can't lose her. I can't lose her."

* * *

_"Daddy!"_

_"Hey, pumpkin." Ashley giggled as her dad scooped her through the air into his arms._

_"Daddy, I have a special gift for my angel, I wanted it to be the right one and all the pictures I draw just aren't right." Ashley's face was scrunched up in thought._

_"Oh yeah? So what did you decide on for Mia?" He smiled warmly at her._

_"I'm gonna give her my heart." Ashley smiled back up at her dad._

_"You know what baby, I think that's the best gift that anyone could ever ask for."_

_Ashley beamed with joy as her dad rubbed his rough beard on her face, she would remember the way his arms held her so tightly later on that night whilst the policemen were downstairs telling her mom that her dad was dead. She would remember and wish that she'd given her heart to him instead._

* * *

"Ashley?" There was a tentative knock before Spencer stepped into the room.

"Hey, is everything okay?" Ashley was immediately alert, concerned that something was wrong.

"No, nothing's wrong, just...have you seen Anabelle? I can't find her anywhere."

"Uh, no." Ashley's mind was abuzz. Where did she go?

Ashley noticed that Spencer was lingering next to her bed, so she grabbed her hand and pulled her onto it, both of them falling into a heap on top of the covers.

"Ashley!" Spencer squealed.

"What? You got a problem with beds?" Ashley laughed, and Spencer smacked her arm.

"No, I have a problem with flying through the air before landing on said bed."

"But I like flying through the air with you."

Ashley watched as Spencer smiled cutely. Her fingers slowly tiptoed up Spencer's stomach and up to her ribcage, stopping abruptly when Spencer squirmed.

"Wha...oh my god, are you ticklish?" Ashley grinned evilly, thinking of all the possible ways she could make Spencer squeal.

"No, as much as I know how much you would positively love that , I'm not ticklish." Spencer smiled.

Ashley leaned over her now, concerned to the maximum, she tucked some stray hair behind Spencer's ear.

"I didn't hurt you did I?"

"Ashley, you could never hurt me...sometimes, the simplest touch from you can make me feel things."

Ashley's eyes darkened as she looked at Spencer.

"Feel things like what?"

Spencer's hands moved to cup her face, her fingers gently tracing the contours of Ashley's face, the face she already knew so well just from touch. Ashley's eyes fluttered closed.

"Like how much I want you...how much I need you near me...how much I love you."

Ashley kissed her.

"I love you too."

Ashley pulled Spencer up into a sitting position on the bed.

"Wait here a minute, I'll be right back."

"Okay."

Ashley ran into the living room and grabbed her guitar. Entering the room, she was suddenly nervous. It was one thing to play a song you've written to a bunch of strangers, but a completely different thing to play a song for and to the woman you love. She hopped back onto the bed, sitting in front of Spencer and placing the guitar in her lap. Spencer's blue eyes seemed to be staring straight into hers.

"I wrote you a song." Ashley watched Spencer's wide smile.

"You did?" She asked excitedly.

"I did. Do you wanna hear it?"

"Yes! Yes! Yes!" Spencer was bouncing on the bed a little bit.

Ashley laughed. "Okay."

Ashley set herself up, even more nervous than she was before she took a deep breath and then looked into Spencer's eyes. And once again, just as it had happened the first time she played in front of Spencer and looked at her face, she instantly felt calm. And began to play.

_Desert skin, you look so good in your desert skin._

_Desert skin, you look so good in your desert skin._

_I love the way that you kiss me_

_I love the way that you hold me_

_Desert skin, I want you to want me, regardless of what I lack_

_Desert skin, I want you to see me for all that I am_

_Desert skin, I won't let you go there's a way out for you_

_Shed your cover right down, to the core_

_And there your true freedom reigns_

_Desert skin, you look so good in your desert skin_

_Desert skin, you look so good in your desert skin_

Ashley looked up to find silent tears streaming down Spencer's face. "Hey, I didn't mean to make you cry." She was using her thumb to wipe away Spencer's tears as Spencer grabbed onto her face and kissed her abruptly. Spencer seemed to be fueling all of her passion into the kiss, and when she finally pulled away, Ashley was left breathless.

"I love you, Ash...I love you so much."

Ashley could feel the tears burning in her eyes as she pulled Spencer into a hug, whispering in her ear she replied, "I love you too."

Spencer was clinging to Ashley tightly, so hard in fact that Ashley was starting to get worried. Pulling away from her slightly she noticed that Spencer was looking a little pale.

"Are you okay?"

"I don't know...I don't feel too good. Maybe if I just rest for a little bit."

"Here, lie down. I'm gonna go call the doctor." Ashley was clearly panicked.

"Ashley, don't leave me."

"I'll be right back, I promise, I'm not leaving you."

Ashley rushed to the telephone in the next room, never feeling more grateful that Paula had put an on-call doctor up in the other guest house. Her hands shook as she talked to the doctor and then to Paula, half listening to them say that they were on their way and praying to whatever god existed that Spencer would be okay.

Rushing back into the room, she held back a sob when she saw that Spencer looked worse than when she'd left her. She'd only been gone a few minutes, but Spencer was already looking paler and more fragile. Sitting on the bed, Ashley held her hand, telling her that everything was going to be okay.

She didn't even hear Paula and the doctor come in, only realizing when she was asked by the doctor if she could wait by the door while he examined her. Paula and Ashley exchanged anxious glances as they waited for the doctor to finish examining her. As soon as he was done, Ashley rushed back to her bedside, instantly warming when Spencer gave her a weak smile.

The doctor had stepped out of the room to talk to Spencer's mom, and Ashley could hear snippets of their conversation...deteriorating fast...hospital...not much time. She blocked it out and focused on Spencer.

"You're gonna be okay, I know you're gonna be okay."

Spencer just smiled and squeezed her hand.

Ashley looked up when Paula walked into the room.

"Spencer, we have to get you to a hospital now, they need to..."

"No," Spencer interrupted. "I'm not going to a hospital. No, I want to be here, at home...when it happens."

Ashley cringed at those last few words and was about to tell Spencer that nothing was going to happen, when she spoke again.

"Ashley I need you to find Anabelle for me."

"Spencer..."

"Ashley please. I'll be right here, please...find Anabelle for me."

"Okay." She kissed her lightly on her forehead, whispering I love you, before she left.

The first thing she did was call Anabelle's cell phone. There was no answer, so she started asking some of the house workers if they'd seen her. One of them finally told her that they'd seen her heading into town. Hopping quickly into her pickup truck, she sped into town hoping that she'd find Anabelle at the market. After about an hour of fruitless searching, she drove back to the house, anxious to see Spencer and make sure she was alright.

As she pulled into the driveway, he heart stopped when she saw Spencer being carried on a stretcher into the doctor's guesthouse. Sheer panic overtook her as she jumped out of the pickup and started running, hair flying, heart pounding, towards the guesthouse. Bursting through the doors, her eyes searched for Spencer. Finding her on a bed in the corner, surrounded by tubes and an IV, Ashley walked over, taking Spencer's hand in her own and stroking her hair.

"Hey." Spencer said quietly, feeling Ashley's hand in her hair.

Ashley, overwhelmed by the sight of Spencer looking so weak surrounded by so much hospital machinery, starts openly crying. The tears flowing fast, and for the first time, she's unable to stop them, unable to hold back the anguish she feels.

"Don't cry," Spencer says weakly, feeling a tear drop on the hand that Ashley's holding.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, it's gonna be okay...I just hate seeing you like this."

"Ashley, it's okay. Listen, I...there's not much time left. Tell my mom and Glen that I love them. And tell Anabelle...tell her I'm sorry, that she was the sister I never had. Tell her that I want her to be happy, no regrets."

"Spencer, stop it! They're all going to be here in a minute...and you're not going anywhere."

"Ashley, no. I have to go..."

"Spencer please don't leave me, god, just please don't leave me." Ashley sobbed.

"Ashley, you have to let me go. It's okay baby, let me go." Spencer stroked her face gently.

"No! No! Stay with me, you're strong, we can fight it together."

"Ashley, it's time. I need you to be strong for me, when I'm gone..."

"You're not going anywhere, you're with me, you're safe. I can't let you go."

"Ashley, please listen to me. I want you to know...I love you. From the very first moment I met you, I knew I loved you." Ashley sobbed harder. "There's no place I'd rather be than her with you. I'll never leave you, I'll always be right here." Ashley's heart wrenched as she felt Spencer place her hand on her heart. "I want you to know that wherever I go, whatever happens, I'll never stop loving you. You're my first, my last, my everything. And I love you."

Ashley sat with her, watching her take her last breath. She held onto her tightly, sobbing into her warm chest, not noticing the sobs of those that had just joined her through her own tears. Spencer was gone. Surrounded by the people she loved most in this world, her soul soared, finally letting go.

_Let's hold hands like the young romance_

_Let's first kiss like the moment we first did_

_We can lose control, baby don't say no, heaven only knows_

_

* * *

  
_


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter 17**

**Dream A Dream Worth Living**

The sun was out, but for Ashley the day couldn't have been any more gloomy. She'd just had to bury the love of her life. She'd watched them lower her body into the ground, watched them throw dirt down that dark hole, words being uttered by the priest - but she wasn't listening. She was oblivious to everything and everybody around her, wrapped up in her own anguish all she could think about was jumping into that dark hole herself.

She could feel Anabelle's presence behind her, her hand on her shoulder.

"Ashley...everybody's going back to the house. Do you want to come back with me?"

She didn't reply. Her gaze solely focused on the pile of fresh dirt that she knew Spencer's body was under. Eventually, she no longer felt Anabelle's presence behind her, she had gone and Ashley was relieved. She wanted to be alone, to be as close to Spencer as she could be.

She didn't know how long she had stood there for, but the sound of the church bell ringing told her that it had to have at least been an hour. Disappointed, she got into her car and drove back to the house. She didn't know what she expected, but she thought if she could be as close to Spencer as possible then somehow she would be able to feel her again, to know that she was still there and maybe she wasn't gone after all.

Pulling into the driveway she could see people milling in and out, everyone dressed in black, looking down at her own back dress she picked off a piece of hair that had clung to it. She hadn't even realized she had been crying until she felt the wetness of a teardrop on her black dress. She just wanted to feel Spencer again, to know that she was close, and to protect her. Protect her the way that she couldn't before, the way she had failed.

Her feet found themselves making their way down the path that they had walked down so many times. As soon as she entered the clearing into their secret garden, memories of Spencer seemed to flood her. She almost staggered under the weight of all the memories, bracing herself against a tree, she took the time to take deep breaths and let the images overtake her completely.

"I told you I'd never leave you."

Ashley looked up quickly, not completely believing what she was seeing. Spencer was smiling, her body radiant, glowing with light. It seemed like her beauty had been magnified by a hundred. Ashley had never seen anything more beautiful in her life.

"Spencer..." Ashley didn't know what to say. Just seeing her floating on air was enough to make her believe she might be dreaming.

"You're beautiful."

"What?" Ashley replied softly, her dazed eyes never leaving Spencer's.

"You're so beautiful. I never thought I'd ever get the chance to see your face, and now that I can, I don't think I'll ever want to look at anything else."

"Spencer I...I don't know what's going on."

"It's okay, neither do I." She smiled.

"I don't think I can let you leave me again. I can't watch you go, so if I'm dreaming, I don't want to wake up."

Spencer held out her hand.

"Come with me."

Their eyes never leaving each other, Ashley placed her hand in Spencer's. Her feet were lifting off the ground and soon enough she found herself floating next to Spencer.

"I missed you," Spencer said tucking a stray curl behind Ashley's ear.

"I missed you too, you have no idea how much."

"Oh, I think I might have a clue," Spencer smiled and Ashley couldn't help but burst out into her nose crinkling grin.

"So what's up there?" Ashley raised her eyes to the sky.

"I don't know. Wanna check it out together?"

"Yes." Ashley smiled at her.

Their forms ascended up into the heavens, hands held, they embarked on their next journey of life, gradually getting smaller. Anabelle stood in the front yard looking up at the two bright stars in the sky that seemed to mesh into one, and smiled.

_When two people are meant to be together, nothing in the universe can keep them apart. You see, there's a bond formed when two people are made for each other that can't be broken. Where one goes, the other will follow, into the next life, and the life after that, and so on for all eternity...until the end of time._

_The End_

* * *


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